 RICKY'S BLOG - Read Ricky's thoughts on his upcoming projects, visits to restaurants and round-headed friends. Week one hundred and seventy-seven - July 2011 Please, please, please sign this petition to stop the slaughter of wild tigers. It's getting pretty serious now. If you do that for me I will continue to post pictures of me and my weird little chums. 
Thank you. 
Hurrah! 
That Golden Globes thing I did has been nominated for an Emmy. Ha ha. Hilarious. Got a nom for the HBO Special too. 
Nothing for The Ricky Gervais Show. Boo! Imagine Karl at the fucking Emmys! It would be amazing. Still, mustn't grumble. Maybe next year. Oh, and The Office got nominated too. Another wonderful instalment of The Office retrospective from The AV Club. And a great article in the Huffington Post too, by Ricky Gervais. (He's brilliant.) A really fun week filming on Life's Too Short. It mainly centred around a Star Wars wedding. 
"You can come in lads, but no trouble." 
"I see everything." 
"Any shit and you can say hello to my little friend." 
"His name's Warwick." 
So from this quote... Stephen said: "We decided, I don't know how it came about, but during the end of one take I think Ricky shouted, 'Fight!' and they started fighting, and it was very, very funny and the two actors were very committed to that, and then subsequently, if a scene's slightly flagging we'll just shout, 'Fight!' and hopefully end the scene with a fight." they went with this... "Ricky Gervais encouraged the dwarf actors on his latest comedy series to fight each other." Actually it was Warwick in a scene with Steve Brody (not a dwarf). It's interesting that they jumped to the conclusion that it had to be two dwarves fighting. Not to mention the fact that they made it sound like it was in the car park at lunch time or something. This is just the beginning of the rumour, assumption and misunderstanding that people will indulge in before anyone has even seen the show. Still, mustn't grumble. That always happens. At least there's nothing on this blog that can be taken out of context. Anyway, here's a dwarf I forced into a jar. 
Thank you to every magazine, newspaper, blogger and tweeter who wrote about or wished The Office a Happy 10th Birthday. It was heartwarming. Genuinely. 
It's been a wonderful 10 years for me. Maybe the best. Life really does begin at 40. I was talking to Sting the other day (as you do), and he said that his best 10 years were from 50 to 60. He also said "D' do do do. D' da da da." so I take everything he says with a pinch of salt to be honest. Still, I guess the point is it's never too late. I'm still discovering new things. Look what I discovered I could do only today... 
Hope you like the little video I did with Warwick. Christian from Absolute Radio came for a set visit but we finished filming so early that he missed everything. So I basically came up with this idea in about 30 seconds, told Warwick to play along and told everyone to shout fight at the end. More Sci-Fi scenes this week. Can't give any more away than that. And this. Oh, and here's another little treat. My inside-man Freddy captured this. 
Rain Forrest Gump! Week one hundred and seventy-six - July 2011 More lovely birthday wishes for The Office. The BBC are running a little retrospective on their website. Raine Wilson from the US Office picked some of his favourite clips too. Also we made this... But moving forward... Did some photos today for Life's Too Short. Some professional, some less professional. Guess which one of these pictures I'm more embarrassed about; 
Another amazingly detailed and wonderful article on The Office at The AV Club. 
Here's the first instalment in case you missed it. The mighty Shortlist magazine is joining in with the retrospective with The Office quiz here. And there's a little interview with yours truly here. For my part I am celebrating by combining the old with the new... Matt Groening's favourite character from The Office will make a cameo in Life's Too Short. 
Another lovely day on Life's Too Short 
I'm actually on the phone to Karl there. He was moaning. I was enjoying my lunch break in the sun. And him moaning obviously. He will never do another series though. That's for sure. So enjoy the next one as it will be the last. I think he's right too. Two series and a special - that's my motto. Ah. A special! Perfect. Let me talk to him. Here's a nice little trailer for the new season of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Nice scarf. Leading up to the 10 year anniversary of The Office... I love this little compilation. A lovely effort which captures the heart of the show in a few minutes without words. Cheers. My favourite news story of all time. I knew my looks and talent would get me in the papers. Week 6 on Life's Too Short. Another great day filming. It really is so much fun. Although sometimes I have to wear my crown to remind everyone who's in charge. 
Week one hundred and seventy-five - June/July 2011 Please Tweet Happy Birthday. This week The Office is 10 years old. 
Well the first episode of series 1 aired at 9.30pm on a Monday night. 9th July, 2001. Obviously the concept existed some time before that. The BBC pilot was shot in January 2000, and we shot our own pilot two years before that. I had David Brent as a character from about 1995 I'd say. (The first "sketch" I had for him was basically the scene where he interviews his new secretary in episode 5.) And he is based on people I'd met throughout my adult life. The very first scene of the series where he is talking to the fork-lift truck driver is based on an interview I had when I was 17 at a temp agency in the school holidays. His opening sentence was, "I don't give shitty jobs." I just looked at him and nodded. He said, "If a good guy comes to me... (points) etc." He phoned his friend and at one point said, "yes of course he's 18." Then he winked at me and did the Pinocchio nose mime. (It was nothing to do with fork-lift truck driving, but it was for work in a warehouse.) Gareth is based on the kid I went to school with who I talk about in most of my stand-up shows, and Tim is based on a guy I used to work with mixed with Norm from Cheers, a little Chandler and a touch of Oliver Hardy. My favourite poem from about the age of 14 was Slough by John Betjeman. These are my fond anniversary memories. They are free. Now buy the fucking anniversary DVD Box set. Another week on Life's Too Short. Here's me saying, "If you don't do it right I'll bang your little heads together." 
And this is me when the alarm goes off at 7am. 
Still mustn't grumble. I have the best job in the world. Good Luck to David Haye. Have a great weekend. So The Office is 10 years old next month. The AV Club are the first to celebrate. Cheers. I couldn't be prouder of The Office, but I don't want to just keep looking back as I think some of my best work is happening now. Look what I did today... 
See what I mean? Genius. Extra! Extra! We've been nominated! 
Well done people. We've been nominated in both the Entertainment category for An Idiot Abroad and the Comedy category for The Ricky Gervais Show at The TV Choice Awards. Obviously I only want to win to get Karl up on stage all grumpy and nervous, but that's beside the point. You know what to do. Please vote here. This is the toughest category... 
I'm torn between Gay Domestic Abuse and Lisa's Rape. I've not actually seen any of them obviously, but they sound great. Here's someone who's watched all those programmes I imagine. 
Jesus Christ, I'm fucking proud of that photo. I know. That's wrong isn't it? Phew! What a scorcher. Some of us are always cool though. (Not me, obviously. But some of us are. That's my point.) 
I ruined quite a few takes today by laughing. That's a good sign, trust me. I think on The Office we got through about 20% of takes without someone losing it. Talking of The Office... So the news is out that James Spader is joining the cast permanently. The press still seem to confuse applying for Michael Scott's job with auditioning for Steve Carell's job. Like those actors were taking cameos to see if they were taken on permanently? Ridiculous. Maybe some of them were hopeful but as Exec Producer I can tell you that wasn't the case. I think some journalists are confusing the show with American Idol. Like the public voted James Spader in. Ha ha. Still can't quite get over Christopher Guest giving me a Spinal Tap guitar. Slightly surreal. I sent him this to add to his collection. 
He says he's doing a book of my best ones. What I did on my Birthday by Ricky Gervais, aged 50. Got up at 10am (a 3 hour lie in these days) and opened loads of lovely presents from Jane. We went for a walk and had brunch. I then had to do a little bit of work. (Some extra scenes for Spy Kids.) Worked-out, then we went to my birthday dinner with the lovely Chris and Jamie Guest at Galvin at Windows restaurant. Some more lovely presents and the usual wonderful meal from one of the best restaurants in the world. But then something quite special happened. Chris gave me his Fender guitar from Spinal Tap. I was speechless. It was really too much. What a remarkable gift. I had to have a little lie down in his hotel suite. 
Week one hundred and seventy-four - June 2011 Half way through filming on Life's Too Short. 4 down, 4 weeks to go. Did some more acting today. I played a rich successful actor writer director producer who takes the piss out of little weird chums and always wears a black T-shirt and jeans. 
I look very different in my latest movie cameo though. 
As you can see, I've made quite an effort. Thanks to everyone who bought the paperback of An Idiot Abroad by the way. Karl has done three trips now with four to go. I spoke to him last night. He had done something so useless that as I was taking the piss he started laughing. Have you any idea how good it feels to make Karl laugh? It's a shame he's not here for my birthday. It's sort of become a tradition over the years to celebrate it with the little bald-headed twonk. Fucking 50 for fuck's sake? Still, mustn't grumble. Have a great weekend. You may have heard that a few more well-known faces have joined the cast of Life's Too Short. 
Sting and Steve Carell join Johnny Depp, Les Dennis, Cheggars and Barry off Eastenders. There is another big face from The Office too. And something for Dr Who fans. And what's going on here? 
I'll tell you if you buy our book and play our little Karl game. Couldn't help but think of Karl when I read my menu. 
Because a Mank Kipper is exactly, "what I done him up like" today. Ha ha. Still. The paperback is at No.2 in the bestseller list this week. That should cheer him up. (It should...) Hope this teaser... teased you Hosted a big charity event today. 
Don't worry. It wasn't for real. It was for a scene in Life's Too Short so I was earning fucking good money for it. It also involved a big guest star playing themselves, and a lute. No more clues. Busy day. Luckily, still found time to take this... 
Week one hundred and seventy-three - June 2011 Spent the weekend walking, eating, drinking, staying up late (sometimes midnight), catching up on The Apprentice, going to the dentist, working out, editing, (Ricky Gervais Show, Idiot Abroad, Life's Too Short), doing international press interviews, fan mail, charity paintings and drawings (such a brilliant bloke), 300 emails, laundry, dry cleaning, calling Karl and learning lines. So after a relaxing two days off, I'm looking forward to another week sitting in a chair saying, "can you do it more like this?. Action." 
Talking of action... Bucket list. 1. See a whale 2. Swim with Dolphins 3. Dress up like a Manc Judge Dredd and nearly shit myself on camera for Ricky's amusement 
Thanks to Freddie Claire, the sound man, who is managing to get photos of Karl at his happiest. Keep 'em coming. My second Marriage Ref appearance airs this Sunday by the way on NBC. Oh, and Sky are having a bit of a Ricky Gervais night on my birthday, with a stack of Idiot Abroad, a Simpsons and an interview with Alex Zane. Cheers. The repeat fees alone make a lovely gift. Ha ha. I'm joking of course, I am very flattered. Enjoy. Another amazingly fun day playing with my little chums. 
That's a good idea for a new, one-off thread. Ricky and his little chums. 
Ricky and Elmo. 
Ricky, Elmo and Warwick. 
Ricky, Karl and Warwick. Have a great weekend. Did my first bits on screen today. 
In my own T shirt. 
And jeans. 
And office. Convenient. Another wonderful day filming Life's Too Short. 
Mr Greg James of Radio 1 popped in on his way to work. I say work... ha ha. 
Only joking. (That's my job.) It comes in handy too. The best thing to do with a 6 ft 3 heavyweight champion of the world is make them laugh by the way. 
Hold on he's using the same tactic. 
He's scared. Win Ricky win! Ding Ding. 
Filming in central London today. 
The mighty Steve Brody was on good form. 
He was the only actor (apart from Merchant and me) to appear in both The Office and Extras. He is now the only one to appear in all three of our sitcoms. That might be a tie-breaker question in a pub quiz one day. Remember it. It could be worth a crate of Newcastle Brown. I understand there is a campaign to get my Golden Globes gig nominated for an Emmy, and another to get me to host all awards shows. This is both hilarious and very very flattering. I thank you sincerely and ask you to continue the good work. However I wonder if as well as that, or even instead of that, you might concentrate your energies on getting Karl Pilkington an Emmy. We were nominated a few times last year for The Ricky Gervais Show, winning for design, but I'd really like to get one for either the show or for the little round-headed buffoon in particular. He's been through a lot. 
I own this little Island so I can do what I like there. It's tiny but every tyrant has to start somewhere right? 
I've renamed it El Brente. Week one hundred and seventy-two - June 2011 End of week 2 on Life's Too Short. 
I filmed a little sketch for my old pal Conan too. Have a great weekend. So you may have heard that I'm doing a Q and A in Edinburgh with Warwick talking about Life's Too Short. 
Should be fun. Or "fun sized" as Karl would say. I'm also doing a talk about An Idiot Abroad 2: The Bucket List while I'm up there. Sadly Karl is too lazy to attend, the fckkkkingggggrndhedddedmmnccccnnnnnttttttttt.  Another great day filming Life's Too Short. 
Planned another little "treat" for Karl today too. Ha ha. The first season of An Idiot Abroad is being repeated in the U.S. from June 18th by the way. Friday is a big day. Not only is it the last day you can vote for Karl to win some more awards, but it's also the finale of The Ricky Gervais Show on Channel 4. Here's one of my all-time favourite fucking illegal clips again. We sold our 10 millionth audiobook yesterday. To Karl's and Steve's annoyance we have given away a further 308 million podcasts. Still. Definitely mustn't fucking grumble. We will record 13 new episodes over Christmas for series 4 of The Ricky Gervais Show animation by the way. I suppose we could then release it as just audio after the series has aired on TV. We'll see. Oh, this... 
Head like a fucking apple. Finally Entertainment Weekly ran the first behind the scenes look at Life's Too Short. Cheers. Just got this email from Karl and I immediately burst out laughing. (If you can imagine that.) 
Ha ha. Amazing. He's not the only one with a little friend. 
That was the summer of 2011. 
Good point. So, Jerry Seinfeld was fantastic. We met up afterwards before he jetted off to Norway. I bet he landed in Oslo before I got back to Hampstead from the fucking O2. I told him to play Finchley Arts Depot next time. This is strange but true, and flattering too. The Invention Of Lying is to have a special screening at The LA Film Festival. One of the curating artists, Erykah Badu, has chosen it to be shown, followed by a Q and A, so thanks for that. Please bid on a pair of my trainers. I'd only worn them about twice when the request came in. Not that you could actually go out in them with "Ricky Gervais" scrawled on the side, but just sayin'. Basically, they're in mint condition if that raises more money? It's for charity by the way. I'm not just flogging them on ebay. Like Steve Merchant does. I know what it feels like to be him now... 
Things to do this week... Vote for Karl to win another award. Watch the finale of The Ricky Gervais Show on C4 (if you haven't already on E4 or on demand.) Thank you kindly. Week one hundred and seventy-one - May/June 2011 An Idiot Abroad has won its first award in The US. Karl Pilkington was named Best Presenter at The Factual TV Awards in LA. Next stop The Emmys. 
We are selling the format of the show by the way. Just like we did with The Office. But this time instead of finding fat, annoying middle-aged men they have to find bald, foreign, winging mongs. The ungrateful Manc twat can buy another house now. An absolutely fantastic first week filming Life's Too Short. I'll post some pics when I get them back from Snappy Snaps. Off to see Seinfeld now. Have a great weekend. So I got him here, but if you didn't get a ticket watch all of us on Talking Funny. Nice plug Rick. Seamless. I sent him an email yesterday. It just read, "RE: O2 Gig. Ready?" He sent back, "Oh Shit!" So I sent back, "Don't panic. Just remember a tramp is a bum, a bum is a fanny, and a fanny is a lady's front bottom. Oh and our national dish is Wangers and Mash." Let's see if he uses such killer material. Now, this is... 
Self explanatory really. This might need a bit more working out 
Spider Manc? Another weird and wonderful day on Life's Too Short. 
I told Warwick he will be able to move out of this neighbourhood next year when he wins an Emmy. He said, "Maybe I could share in the profits if the show takes off like The Office?" I said, "Just cut the fucking grass." Talking of The Office, (as I sometimes do); 
it's won another arbitrary poll. It still counts! Don't forget to get An Idiot Abroad in paperback 
out now!My wish is really coming true by the way. Not only has the show been sold to about 30 countries (long way to go to beat The Office although it's a start) but Karl is getting recognised everywhere he goes now. Ha ha. They often get very excited and say, "You're the idiot!" Perfect. Can you imagine his fucking face? The second season is going great. 3 down 5 to go. We're about a quarter of the way through season 3 of the The Ricky Gervais Show too. I think it's getting better and better. Hope you enjoyed the finale on E4. It's on C4 next Friday remember. Here's a right fucking illegal clip. Getting up early. Dwarves. Sleep. First day of filming today. It went so well I'm worried. It was TOO easy. We're going to find out there was no film in the camera or something. Warwick was fantastic. The comedy sensation of next year methinks. There I go with my big mouth again. This wasn't my fault though; So, I did an interview recently in which, as usual, they asked me about all the celebrities being upset at the Golden Globes. I played it down by saying, "Oh they don't mind... they're above it... no Johnny Depp was fine, he's doing a cameo in my new sitcom... blah blah blah." This is the headline they went with...
If the Grey Squirrel and the Black Bird can live together, then why can't we, for heaven's sake? 
How much does Ollie want to smash through that fucking window? We start filming Life's Too Short on Monday 30th May. An historic day I'm sure you'll agree. 
I will of course keep you posted as usual. But here's an extra long blog entry in case I'm too busy to do much during the week. Spoke to Karl today. He told me that he'd gone mental about something. I was crying with laughter as he described how he had nearly "shat himself with fear". I wont give it away. But I cannot wait to get the footage back in the edit. It sounds like the funniest thing so far. We're really flying through series 3 of The Ricky Gervais Show. It's like a well oiled machine now and the episodes just seem to be getting better and better. (You'll be the judge of that.) It seems to be growing as a cult too. (Well more of a religion really.) There is nothing like word of mouth. No poster or billboard campaign can compete with it. So thank you to everyone who raved about it to friends. Tell them they can get all the original unedited audio on iTunes. Or they can try the starter pack for free. I read that our world record had been broken for downloads. The weird thing is it said the new record was 59 million. We've had over 300 million downloads. I think you actually have to be bothered to call them up and say, "can we be in your book?" The Guardian did that for us last time. I'm sure our original figure has been broken many times in the last 5 years but no one has bothered to claim it officially till now. Not even us. Ha ha. Lazy. Don't forget there's no Ricky Gervais Show this week on C4. The finale is on June 10th. Oh, and don't miss Talking Funny on Sky Atlantic June 2nd. Same day the paperback of An Idiot Abroad comes out. And my mum's birthday. She would have fucking loved Karl. That's for sure. Just like Mark in The Invention of Lying, I never got to buy her that mansion. (She wouldn't have moved even if I had. Ha ha. Bless her.) And finally... It's a miracle! If you look closely, you can clearly see the star of Bethlehem in my glasses. Or is it an angel? Or is it actually Christ? I don't know, but it makes you think doesn't it? 
It makes me think that God made me say all those awful things. Of course. That's why he made me thank him too. I've never thanked him for anything before. Makes sense. Those shades really make a difference by the way. Look at me without them. 
That's what I imagine a spider's face looks like, magnified 1,000 times. One of those fat ginger things. (And I don't mean Louis C.K.) Week one hundred and seventy - May 2011 Couple of nice things in the post today. This from HBO saying good luck with the Life's Too Short filming. 
Always wanted a solid silver Karl. And my new ZX1000 Robotic Cat arrived. 
Oh, and Karl sent me this... 
You can tell that because of all the years he's spent with me, this is not putting him off in the slightest. Don't forget to vote for An Idiot Abroad and The Ricky Gervais Show. And pre-order the paperback .
In return I will continue to post photos of the round-headed twonk in awkward situations. Don't miss the penultimate episode of season 2 of The Ricky Gervais Show, Friday on Channel 4. Or watch it on 4OD. It's doing very well indeed thanks to you. I even got an email from the big cheese at 4, saying the figures have gone up yet again, which is unheard of, and it's getting another 2.8 million on demand. Amazing. Don't think I haven't noticed that you've been spreading the word. A sincere thank you. Oh, and by the way, the finale isn't next week but the week after, on the 10th of June. You'll miss us. What you can see next week is Talking Funny on Sky. Not the same I know, but fun in a different way I hope. Played with dwarves again all day then went to dinner with J.J. Abrams then went home and a fox looked at me through the window. I know that sounds like a dream but... 
Have a great weekend. As Ice Cube once said, "Today was a good day." (He also said, "A bitch is a bitch," and I can't really argue with that either.) I played with a dwarf all morning and took pictures, stitched Karl up and had it filmed, and got a call from Robin Ince asking me to publicise a charity gig. I said I would do it as long as he introduces himself on the night by saying, "Hello I'm Robin Ince, and I'm a good little girl." Anything for a friend. I'm such a philanthropist. Am I doing too many good things for the world? Probably. But that's the kind of guy I am. This was another good day. The debate rages - [PopWatch] | [CNN] The comments are of course the best bit. Ha ha. Lots of potential candidates for 'People on the internet who "know" stuff'. So, if we can put a tennis court on the roof, and a pool in the basement, I'm probably going to go for this one; 
It's quite pricey but I will still have enough left over for a makeover... 
You really shouldn't be able to do that with a face. Or this... 
Anyway, here I am with various chums talking about the N word on Talking Funny. And of course on Sesame Street. And now, another instalment of this blog's regular feature... People on the internet who 'know" stuff. Rick, can we have the jingle mate? "Ooh, Chimpanzee that! He's only gone and written something down that he knows fuck all about the fffffkkkknnngccccnnnnnt." Cr1spy69 Chris Houghton Why do people think Karl Pilkington is amusing? The Idiot abroad is scripted and if people can't see that then who is the idiot? 21 May It's a good question. And I think we all know the answer. Karl was cool about it. He said, "Best compliment. Means they must think it is excellent." He wasn't so cool about the transport I arranged for him on his latest trip. I won't spoil it for you but you'll like it, I promise. (He should have read the script. Oh fuck. Graham, I mean Karl will kill me.) Please watch this week's The Ricky Gervais Show on E4 and Channel 4. Here's a right fucking illegal clip to get you started. And remember to vote for it here. It's better than that disappointing rapture that's for sure. Week one hundred and sixty-nine - May 2011 There is still some sanity in the world. Thank you Cinema Blend. I think I should start calling this blog "In context". Or maybe I should just shut the fuck up. But where's the fun in that? I was a bit surprised about the reaction, but then I keep saying that don't I? I just need to make one final point on the subject. When I said that I did the original version of The Office purely for the art and the US version not purely for the art, I wasn't suggesting that the US version was therefore artless, or that anyone else involved didn't do it for the art. I was just admitting that there were obviously other factors and reasons present in my involvement in the remake. People must understand that being Exec Producer on a network juggernaut with tons of politics and billion dollar committee decisions, is going to instil different types of pride and loyalty than a tiny show created from scratch which you then write, direct and star in and talk about for 10 years. Anyway, let's say no more about it. Spent yesterday looking for a little property in the country. A little bit of land with a pond and a tennis court to pop down to weekends, like Karl does. Can't decide though... 
or this... 
or this... 
Jane was worried that it would be a nightmare to maintain and clean. Lazy fucking bitch. At least there's nothing in this blog entry that can be taken the wrong way. Blog extra Sorry, who dissed The Office finale? I fucking didn't, that's for sure. I simply said it's different to the original which I created and made with different ambitions. What's wrong with that? The bit about it "jumping the shark" and being like Chris Martin in Extras was meant to be a little self deprecating in-joke. I myself, did a fun but pointless, over-hyped cameo in the episode too remember. I did it for a laugh like everyone else, I assume. I certainly wasn't dissing anyone involved more than myself. The US version of The Office has probably made me ten times the money that the UK version did. I wouldn't knock it. It's still my show. All I said was I do it for different reasons. That is simply what they call the truth. Hope that's OK. I believe I am still entitled to an honest opinion. After all, every other cunt is. I also love how people have confused interviewing for Michael Scott's job, with auditioning for Steve Carell's job. Ha ha. Amazing. Still, mustn't grumble. _________ Oh my God. We have to make sure Karl collects this award. Vote everyday for the next few weeks. Doesn't matter where you are in the world. Tweet this link. Call your friends. Put a comment on every YouTube video. Start another campaign. But get that fucking little bald-headed Manc twat his first TV award. Thank you. Have a great weekend. Watching The Office finale may remind some of the Chris Martin episode of Extras. "It's only Warren Buffett........ What are you doing in a paper merchant's in Scranton? It's mental." If you're going to jump a shark, jump a big one. Still we've a had a good innings. Ha ha. I assume most people know I didn't do the US remake for the art. I did my version for the art. That's why I stopped it after a few hours of telly. Don't get me wrong. I'm very proud of the US version. It was not only a very very good network comedy but it was also a massive success story. But you know, I did it for different reasons, ambitions and with slightly different emotional attachments to the project. And once and for all... I would never ever in a million years take a permanent role in the show as an actor. It really would be fucking mental. You don't start a company to work on reception. Can't wait to start work on the Chinese version. Bill Gates is in that one. Anyway, as you may know there's been 10 years of The Office in some form or another. Happy Birthday... From The San Francisco Chronicle: "Champagne Cinemas Target Big Spenders in Ricky Gervais's Hood" Have you any idea how proud I am of that headline? I don't own Hampstead yet, but I am working on it. Tech recce all day. That's where you drive to every location and answer hundreds of questions really confidently. I once asked David Koepp why so many Hollywood directors wear baseball caps. He said, "Because with your head down, people can't see your face, so they don't ask you questions." Perfect. Finished a rough edit of Karl's first An Idiot Abroad 2 trip. Fuck me what a whinging Manc twat. So, as I say, as good as the first series. I was sad that they didn't get that phone message on camera. But don't worry. There's plenty more where that came from. Have another listen. Ha ha. Couldn't help but notice the most recent comment... Wow what a pathetic fake voice Karl sounds nothing like that deusches!!! Rogers6255 1 day ago I love people on the internet that "know" stuff. Still loving rehearsals. All going swimmingly. Thanks for asking. In fact it's going too well. I'm suspicious. Karl has started to rub off on me maybe. I spoke to him about six times today. We're trying to work out when we can record the new podcast for season 4 of The Ricky Gervais Show. Everyone is so busy now. Karl's off around the world all the time, me and Steve are making Life's Too Short for the next few months, then he's on tour and I'm in America. It's mental how you can suddenly find that you can't find one whole week in a year that you're all free. But we will. I promise. I also told Karl that An Idiot Abroad became the highest rated entertainment programme ever on the Australian channel this week. I was very excited. Karl, unimpressed said, "Yeh but I think it's quite a new channel." Ha ha. Good point. I said, (still trying to enthuse) "But that's Sky, Science Channel and now this one, where we're the highest rated ever..." I think he mumbled something. Not sure. The only thing he's really visibly excited about is the animation. He loves it. It's like he's watching someone else. He laughs for the first time when he sees each new episode. It's a start. Or it could be the end. Again, not sure. Oh, he's also excited about being on The Simpson's. I won't give the joke away but they are featuring a little clip of The Ricky Gervais Show in a future episode. He said, "good that init?" Trust me. That's him being over the fucking moon. Sky have done a nice little resume in the lead-up to Talking Funny. Should I be depressed that they basically covered everything on just one page? Ha ha. Fair enough. Rehearsals all day for Life's Too Short. (I say all day, 11 till 2 ish. You don't wanna be over-rehearsed do you? It's only TV. No point killing yourself) This attitude is why one page can sum up my entire career. Life's Too Short... Scripts are completely finished and we start rehearsals this week. We've put together an amazing cast so it should be a joy. 
An Idiot Abroad... Starts in Australia this week with a primetime slot on Channel 1. The second series is going great. Definitely as good as the first I'd say. Don't forget to pre-order the paperback
It comes out the same day as Talking Funny on Sky Atlantic by the way. June 2nd. 
Don't forget to watch The Ricky Gervais Show on E4 and Channel 4 this week. We're at number 11 already. Here's a right fucking illegal clip to entice you into watching the whole episode on telly you ffffffggggincnnnnnnnnnttz. Week one hundred and sixty-eight - May 2011 Did a couple of interviews for Talking Funny. It's a tricky one to promote because I want to be honest, so I warn people it's not a comedy show, but rather a show about comedy, but I'm worried people will think it's a dry professorial discussion about our "art". Which it is in parts but there are funny bits too. I think Karl's right. Don't big it up. Watch it you want. If you like it great. If you don't, then don't worry about it. I remembered how the idea came about too. It was after a gig in New York and the other three came backstage and just started talking about the show. I thought what a spiffing idea for a TV program. You'll be the judge of that. Did another session of Spy Kids. That's how I like to do a whole movie. Sitting in a chair talking bollocks for a few hours. Hey don't knock it. Look at the podcasts. And Flanimals. OK, everything I've ever done. Talking of which, here's an illegal fucking clip of us on that lovely Australian radio show. Have a great weekend. I sent Will Smith a text saying that The Hollywood Foreign Press want to hold next year's Gloden Globes in his trailer.  He sent me one back that said "Only if you're host." Nice. My Inside The Actors Studio is on Sky Arts on the 21st May. I think they cut the two "wee breaks". Jesus. We filmed for 4 hours. I think they could have watched everything I've done in that time. It was actually a lot of fun. The problem is not taking yourself too seriously when people clap every time something you've worked on is mentioned. It was an honour though. Hope you enjoy it. I forgot to tell you that they moved The Ricky Gervais Show to Fridays as the ratings kept creeping up. Thanks for everyone who watched and spread the word. Continue to "Manc up the world". That's like "spice up your life" but in reverse. Did an interview today for Australian radio. It was a prerecord for Friday's Hamish and Andy Show. Karl insulted about a third of the world's population basically. Good going. The Daily Mail thinks this pose was due to a gruelling run.  Actually, seconds before this photo was taken, my butler was pouring me some sangria, but fled when he saw the paparazzi. Had our read-through today of all seven eps of Life's Too Short. It was so much fun seeing the script come to life. Can't wait to start shooting it now. Although I'm worried that the filming could mean eight weeks of steadily getting fat again. The way I've lost weight isn't really by dieting you see. I still probably take in the same calories as I used to, but I just work out like fucking Rocky for an hour a day, 7 days a week to burn it all off. If I haven't got time to work out I'm scuppered. I could stop eating and drinking too much I suppose, but where's the fun in that? I can't believe the David Brent character was fired straight away on last night's The Apprentice. Shame. Talking of which...  Did a photoshoot for An Idiot Abroad 2. It was great. Even Karl enjoyed it. I know, amazing right? We started work on the 3rd episode of The Ricky Gervais Show season 3 this week. My favourite episode so far. It's from the "A day in the life of..." podcast and it's going to be fucking brilliant. Don't forget to watch episode 10 of season 2 on E4 and Channel 4 this week by the way. It's the leg rubber one. Here's another fucking illegal clip. Now tweet like mother fuckers about it. Had dinner with the Peggs at the weekend. Lovely. Before we got to the restaurant Jane said, "Don't get overexcited and just play with Simon all night." Turns out that Mo had said the exact same thing to Simon. Anyway, me and Simon got overexcited and played with each other all night. Had dinner with The Pilkingtons tonight. Also Lovely. I suppose Simon's strange-shaped head had eased me into seeing Karl's again. We didn't talk about it as much as usual.  Look at that shine though. We did an interview today for Australia, which airs An Idiot Abroad next week. Karl was on top form moaning about an injection he had to have for his next trip to stop his head swelling up. Perfect. Week one hundred and sixty-seven - May 2011 So, Talking Funny will be on Sky June 2nd, my mum's birthday. Which is apt, because she talked funny. Bless 'er. Oh and I'm going canine in Hollywood.  No not Twilight; Spy Kids. I'm playing a comedy mutt, and it's so much fun as they're are letting me go crazy with it. Not this crazy obviously. Have a great weekend. I'm too busy. I'm knackered. I've pulled a muscle in my stomach from too many sit-ups and bunny-hopping up steps. (ridiculous) I have a stupid fucking Brent beard at the moment and I burnt my tongue on porridge, (that must have been papa bear's. I still don't know why the smallest bowl of porridge would have been "just right". Assuming they were all served at the same time and his was the smallest bowl or portion it would have surely lost heat the quickest.) I'm working on Season 3 of The Ricky Gervais Show, An Idiot Abroad 2 and the fucking eponymous idiot has just had a fucking holiday, and we're about to start filming Life's Too Short. Life IS too fucking Short. Still mustn't grumble. At least I've still got my looks.  Here's a tune from my band of the month. Over half way through Series 2 of The Ricky Gervais Show in the UK. Ep 9 this week. Here's a right fucking illegal clip. Now watch the whole episode on the telly you scrounging cunts. I mean, thanks for watching. The first episode of Season 3 features Karl's second brilliant movie idea, by the way. It may even overshadow the great Clive Warren. Here's another from my new favourite band at the moment. Ooooooh... who's it gonna be? This is me running away from it.  Do not bet on me taking over whatever you do. Or could I just be trying to throw you off the scent? No. No I'm not. But why am I appearing in it then? Well, because it's a good show and I have a massive stake in the company so to speak. Think of me as a player/manager. That's why I'm running; to stay match fit. This analogy is wearing thin. Like me. Ha ha brilliant one Rick. Here's a tune I can't stop listening to at the moment. The whole of America is talking about one thing.  Who will take over from Osama Bin Laden as boss of al-Qaeda? It's only been a few days since the inevitable departure of Osama Bin Laden from al-Qaeda but speculation over his replacement is rife. Names like Will Arnett and Ed Helms are certainly in the frame, but of course the truth is being kept top secret for obvious reasons. We do have intel that suggests we will know for sure on May 19th. Current favourites for the job are Ray Romano, James Spader, Will Ferrell and the man that started it all; simply known as "the brains behind the outfit" Ricky Gervais.  As one door closes another opens: Ray Romano and James Spader are among the names being bandied about as the new boss.  Funnymen: Original boss and creator Ricky Gervais is also in the frame, along with megastar comedian Jim Carrey. Gervais has stated many times that he is not interested in the job permanently as he feels he has "done his bit." The Invention of Lying star added "Osama will be a tough act to follow" Week one hundred and sixty-six - April/May 2011 So the question is, do I continue to treat this blog like some sort of therapeutic dumping ground for the day's thoughts? You know, the raw, uninhibited ramblings as with a close friend in private? Or, because there can't be much news around at the moment and everything I say becomes a tacky headline, should I resort to my press interview technique that I've used over the last 10 years, and become as boring and guarded as possible? Vote now. Talking of keeping it real... I fucking loved Obama's beautiful destruction of Trump. I've been invited to this event a couple of times but couldn't make it. God, I would have loved to have seen this. I think I may suggest that he does the Golden Globes next year. Simon Pegg asked me for a quote for his autobiography which is coming out in the U.S. soon. I eventually gave him a couple of sincere ones... "One of my favourite people" and, "Funny and easy going, like the author" But only after I made him consider these... "If Simon says this book is good, I believe him" Ricky Gervais "When the hilarious Simon Pegg asked me for a quote for his book I said no" Ricky Gervais "I will never read this book, so you should" Ricky Gervais "Simon Pegg is one of the biggest Office fans I have ever met" Ricky Gervais "I can't wait to read this book. Hope he talks about the rape" Ricky Gervais "If you think I'm amazing, then you may like this book" Ricky Gervais "Simon Pegg looks like Stewie from Family Guy" Ricky Gervais We're out to dinner with The Peggs next week actually. When Karl's away I need a little weird-shaped head to squeeze. I hope he doesn't get jealous. Here's a wonderful tune. So, Will and Kate got hitched at the biggest most expensive wedding of the century so far, and Steve Carell left The Office. I can't help but feel that both will cost me money in the long run. Ha ha. Everybody was saying that David Beckham has started to look like me. I was flattered until I realized that my name was somehow being used as an insult. (Fuck it. I'm still taking it as a compliment.) Here he is looking great...  I didn't even get the day off as we're in pre-production for Life's Too Short. Talking of footballers, me, and little people, here's something that Steve's mum said was the best thing she'd ever seen him in. Have a lovely weekend. I don't know who to believe. Steve Carell leaves in tonight's episode. And then the Royal Wedding. Quite a week. Did the last of the casting today on Life's Too Short. Some amazing cameos too. You know about the Depp one, but hopefully we might be able to keep a couple of the other really big ones under wraps. Not just because of the surprise factor but because it takes the focus away from the real meat of the show. That happened with Extras a bit. It wasn't till the last episode that people realised it wasn't really about all the famous people in it. I suppose I want people to watch the show because of all the hard work that we put into the writing and directing and producing. And not just because of the ridiculously amazing stars that for some reason still want to work with me despite the fact that I insult them at award shows. Ha ha. Just sayin' like. I sent Prince Harry a text today offering to gag up his best man speech. (True.) He said he was fine. Hmmm? If I hear he's done any holocaust or famine shit I will sue obviously. I also reminded him it wasn't fancy dress. On a serious note; I really like Harry. I like William too and really wish the happy couple all the best, as I would anyone on their wedding day. But... really. Enough already. Who are these fucking mongs from all over the world camping out for fucking days to get a 30 second glimpse of two people from 30 yards away? Christ. Still, mustn't grumble. I suppose everyone gets a day off. Congrats Will and Kate and Farewell Steve Carell. There. I joined in. Hope you liked The Ricky Gervais Show on E4. It was from the Guide to The Future and had my favourite closing line of the series so far. If you missed it watch on Channel 4 on this Thursday. The Guide to Comic Relief became the most downloaded single episode of The Ricky Gervais Show this week when it clocked up 9 fucking million. Mental. Here's the top 10 if you're interested. 1. Comic Relief 2. A day in the life 3. World Cup 4. The English 5. Thanksgiving 6. Christmas 7. Halloween 8. Fame giveaway 9. Bonus hour 10. Medicine We started production on season 3 this week. Don't want to give too much away but we'll really be mixing it up this series to make sure we've used up all the best stuff before we do brand new stuff for season 4. We're going to use the army podcast and some stuff from interviews which were never released. So there'll be a few bits and pieces that most people have never heard before. Spoke to Karl today by the way. Again, can't give too much away, but he told me something that he had witnessed that made me laugh so much that my neck hurt. I know that's not saying much when you know how funny I find Karl, but this statement was incredible even for him. This is me walking home by the way...  Thought you'd want to know what that looked like.  Casting all day for Life's Too Short. So much fun. The scripts are working great and we've got a fantastic ensemble together. Really can't wait to start filming. I get an adrenaline rush thinking about it now that I know it's going to be good. (You'll be the judge of that.) Here's me pretending not to take being honoured too seriously. A lighthearted rant for entertainment purposes. Oh Lordy. Nay, Fuck me!, even. I can't believe that some people didn't realise that the blog entry I did as "DICKY"... FUCKING... "JARVIS" was a spoof. Wow. (Just to be clear, many of the opinions expressed were not the same as mine.) Quite unbelievable. The same thing happened with the Ten Commandments thing. So many people took it seriously and started deconstructing it like I'd tried to get it published as an academic paper. It was even discussed on TV news and radio shows and fucking discussion panels. It was simply me "fucking about" on my blog. I didn't even do it for The Wall Street Journal, like last time. (They took it and re-presented it this time by the way.) My fault again probably. The last one I did was more serious and considered, so maybe people thought that this one was in a similar vein. It wasn't. The last one wasn't exactly Sam Harris either but at least everything I said was sincere as opposed to semi-spoof. Once again... this one was me "fucking about." AS IF, I think I'm a good fucking Christian. Fuck that. AS IF, I really think I score ten out of ten for those fucking stupid, cunty, cunting, cunted-up, bastard, shit-eating, fuck-pissing, Ghandi-raping, AIDS-sucking, Hitler-jizzing-on-Mother-Theresa's-tits-in-heaven-with-every-evil-cunt-who-ever-lived-and-did-some-fucking-terrible-things-but-then-said-'sorry'-and-got-into-the-fucking-party-watching-and-wanking-for-all-eternity, made up, 'Straight from God' my arse, bollocks, bullshit, commandments. I don't. Because it's no plan for life and it's based on a stupid fucking lie... in my opinion. OK... Calm. Breathe. I... am... not... angry... Good. Let's never talk of this again. Hope you liked the little meta gag in The Office this week. Michael Scott describes The Dundie awards as,"like The Golden Globes but less mean." One review said that they were glad that, "Ricky Gervais was slammed for his Golden Globe performance." Ha ha. I can only assume that they don't know that I exec. produce the show and that we clearly put in a little in-joke. Someone said the same about the gag in The Simpsons episode I did recently where there was a sign; "don't let this man host." You can't slam someone that is complicit in "the slamming". It's an unwritten TV/comedy/chum rule. Talking Funny went down very well indeed. Might do another one. Week one hundred and sixty-five - April 2011 It's Saint George's Day on Saturday. Yay! Now, everyone knows that God is the greatest Englishman of all time. But who is second? Churchill? Newton? Darwin? Ooh it's so subjective isn't it? And everyone knows that the greatest LIVING Englishman is me. But again, who's bloody second? Aghhhh. You're all saying different things. Here's my vote, for what it's worth: The wonderful David Attenborough. That's how I want the rest of the world to perceive an Englishman. Or me at the Golden Globes. Similar. Watch Talking Funny this weekend on HBO by the way. Happy St. George's Day/Easter/Talking Funny/Weekend. "And did those feet in ancient times, walk upon England's pastures green?" ...No. Almost certainly not. But it's a lovely tune. Hi guys, Dicky Jarvis here, Thanks for visiting my website. 
First of all let me tell you if there is anything on this blog you don't agree with please let me know and I will change it. For me the most important thing in the world is fitting in. Anyway... This is my cat Molly. 
She says hello too (Did I tell you I was a bit wacky? Well I am. LOL.) Yes I believe cats can talk!!!! Ha ha. (I warned you.) No, but seriously. I love just chillin' out with friends (when I'm not working that is!!! Aghhhhhhh!! I HATE WORK.!) ha ha only joking. I would hate to be unemployed so thank God that I've actually got a job to moan about! (see - I can be quite philosophical sometimes. Barf!) Interests. I bloody love comedy. Especially panel shows, Comic Relief, anything on BBC 3 and TV stand-up. And here's the weird thing - I also love really, like radical cutting edge stuff too. (uh????) Yes. I always vote for Bill Hicks and Richard Prior in those Channel 4 polls. I also love Dr Who (don't get me started... Nerd Warning! ha ha), and anything with Jimmy Nesbit. No he's not on Twitter unfortunately. I've checked. ): I love following celebs on Twitter. Especially if they are tweeting each other!!!. They could just email one another but they allow us to peek into their everyday lives. Thanking you... now give me some money! (Only joking. I would never borrow money. PET HATE = SCROUNGERS) I'm not being cruel, I just think that "God helps those that help themselves" (although if you help yourself to my Hobnobs I'll blooming kill you.) Joking! I would never kill anyone. Unless they were raping a baby, and killing them was the only way I could stop them. (OTHER PET HATE = PAEDOPHILES) And by the way, Michael Jackson was not one. He was way too talented and gentle. Here's one of my favourite comedians nailing Atheists. (Yes PET HATE WARNING = ATHEISTS!. Keep it to yourselves losers. Just because you don't believe in hell doesn't mean that you won't be spending an awful lot of time there. Ha ha. Whoops. Shouldn't laugh. Not very Christian. SOZ) Hope you enjoyed episode 7 of The Ricky Gervais Show on E4. Please watch on C4 this Thursday if you missed it. And tell your friends. Or not. Doesn't matter. We've got series 3 commissioned now. Watch any old shit. Only joking! I love you all, and value your input. (OK, you know that's a lie. I don't value your input, but thanks for watching.) As you may know we are currently making season 2 of An Idiot Abroad. I spoke to Karl today. He was angry but defiant, resilient and philosophical all at the same time. I can't tell you any details as it will spoil the fun, but needless to say we had just "done him up like a kipper." I think I made that Time Magazine most-important-human-ever poll thing again. It's a good job I don't take it too seriously, as I think I was thrashed by Susan Boyle. For fuck's sake. Here's my little bit I did for them. It's heavily edited to cut out most of the swearing and "off colour jokes". I'm sure they did it with my best interests at heart. Ha ha. I've just had an amazing idea. For one month - no, one week, I'm going to try to be popular with everyone. Even if I have a strong belief but think it will lose me popularity votes I'm going to either water it down, keep quiet about it or downright lie. OK. Go. I'm sorry I've got fuck all to say. Let me think about it. Ohhhh... I know. Happy Easter. No fuck, happy whatever you celebrate... oh fuck I said "fuck"... some people hate that word. And "Easter". Happy...............Uh.......happy..........NESS. Yes. Good. Happiness. Unless you're bi-polar. In which case you should... be proud of it? See a doctor? Call the press? I'm shit at this aren't I? Let me practice. The Wall Street Journal ran my little Easter essay and it brought out the "angry mentals" again. I've only read a few of the comments, as they are usually too long with little punctuation. It even sounds angry typed out. Hilarious. I was thinking I could do a Talking Funny with Sam Harris, Richard Dawkins and Christopher Hitchens. Just sitting round, sharing the maddest most irrational comments we've read over the years. Would that count as mocking the mentally ill? Not according to the law. So we're fine. We could also talk about how religion started. I think it's a fascinating subject. Who was the first human being to believe in an all-powerful god? Or did he even actually believe it himself? After all, faith heelers and mediums know they're not really doing what they say they are. It's the people who pay them to get a placebo and a false promise who are the believers. Anyway, just another silly idea for a TV show. Or maybe I'll actually start a religion. The Church of Humanity. The do as you would be done by and die happy-ologists. The latter day Rationalists. It's annoying that "The Church of England" is taken. Talking of which, it's Saint George's Day soon. That magical time of year when uptight liberals are afraid to celebrate for fear of seeming racist, and racists get angry because St George's Day isn't racist enough. Here's one of England's finest. We used this at the beginning of Cemetery Junction by the way... Now showing on Sky Movies Premiere. So that was the finale of Season 2 of The Ricky Gervais Show in the US. It went down well and I think everyone agreed that it was even better than season 1. (see reviews of all episodes here. Spoiler alert for fans in The UK obviously.) This week on HBO is Talking Funny. 
As you can tell we're just sitting round in my apartment chatting. Sitting down at home talking. What a fucking brilliant idea for a TV show if you're a lazy opinionated slob who happens to be mates with Jerry Seinfeld, Chris Rock and Louis CK. Now that's what I call a Good Friday. (God made me write that joke. He does everything remember...) Week one hundred and sixty-four - April 2011 Hope you liked my little Easter message. Some people took it a bit too seriously I think. It wasn't meant to be an academic theological debate. It was A BIT OF A LAUGH! Some people even pointed out that I couldn't be a good Christian as I was an Atheist. Ha Ha. Brilliant. Well done. The only even semi-serious point to take from it was that being a Christian doesn't automatically make you a good person. Being an atheist doesn't automatically make you a good person either. Something else makes you good. Following all ten commandments doesn't necessarily make you good. Not following all of them doesn't necessarily make you bad. Following the teachings of Jesus doesn't necessarily make you good. Not following him doesn't necessarily make you bad. And obviously I don't really believe I get a perfect score for goodness. No one does. And if God existed, he really would have a fucking lot to answer for. Have a nice weekend and don't forget to watch the last episode of The Ricky Gervais Show on HBO. As you know I've been doing a bit of PR for my HBO Special, Talking Funny. A few questions keep cropping up... 1. Once and for all. Why in the name of fucking Christ would I take over from Steve Carell in The Office? I did my version. I created The Office and own the format. The original is shown in 90 countries and there are 7 remakes apart from the US version. I am Executive Producer on the US version. I am a lazy son of a bitch. Why the fuck would I get up at 6am, 5 days a week when I earn more money sitting at home in my pants watching these schmucks work their arses off for me? Now do you believe I'm not taking over from Steve Carell? Good. Let's never talk of this again. 2. I didn't watch the Oscars as I was in England and it started about 3am. 3. No I wont be watching the fucking Royal Wedding. I don't even go to my best friends' weddings. 4. I think the same about Charlie Sheen as everybody else. He went crazy. It was funny. It's not so funny now. Hope he's OK. 5. About 22 lbs. Running and weight training. About 50 minutes a day, 5 days a week. 6. NBC want me to host again, but I don't think the Hollywood Foreign Press do. And if they did, and I said yes, I'd do the same again if not worse. 7. Because there is absolutely no evidence of his existence. 8. No it's not scripted. 9. No it's not bullying, he's my best friend. 10. Like a fucking orange. Did Letterman show last night. Great fun as always. Here's me giving him his birthday present. Did 'The View' again too. For people in Britain, that's like 'Loose Women' on much higher salaries. For people in America, 'Loose Women' is the name of a TV show in Britain; not a description of the presenters on 'The View'. Went to see Chris Rock in "The Motherfucker with the Hat." It was great. Really very good indeed. It was a nice Talking Funny reunion too. 
I did a prerecord for The Opie and Anthony show too (transmits Friday). After the record this happened. This is like a dream come true. 
The Science Channel broke the news of season 2 of An Idiot Abroad coming to America. 
Look at that 50 foot mong. The bad news is that it's the last episode of season 2 of The Ricky Gervais Show on HBO this Friday. The good news is that we've started planning season 3. And Talking Funny is on in the same slot next week. Oh, and I bumped into the great Dana White. If you don't know who he is, then you can't be in my gang. 
He is clearly going for a guillotine. Week one hundred and sixty-four - April 2011 New York is mighty fine. Going to see the great Chris Rock in his first broadway play "The Motherfucker with the Hat". (Shakespeare I think.) Talking of the Motherfucker with the hat... I've been practicing for my cameo in True Blood. (And no props or makeup necessary.) 
Doing Letterman, Jon Stewart, Joy Behar, The View and Opie and Anthony plugging Talking Funny this week. Busy, but hardly work I know. Do you ever get the feeling that you're more pleased to see your friends than they are to see you? 
Jane wouldn't let me wrestle Rob last night because he wasn't feeling well. So I didn't. What a kind and thoughtful guy I really am. I've lost even more weight apparently. When I say apparently I mean some cunt made it up. I am 2lbs heavier than I was at The Golden Globes if they must know. 
But I'm fucking ripped now motherfuckers. Ha ha. 
They said it was my LA lifestyle. (Haven't been there since January), and that at a meal with Ridley Scott "I probably stuck to salad". Actually I probably stuck to goat's cheese followed by a fuck-off plate of risotto with Parmesan and about five glasses of wine. How do I get my revenge? Oh I just remembered... "The best revenge is living well." Could be worse. They could be saying I'm too fat. Oh wait, they did a couple of years ago. I wish there was a war on somewhere that they could talk about. Anyway, off to New York now. Just had two soft-boiled eggs with toast in the lounge by the way. I had a bowl of porridge with a chopped banana before I left the house. Is that enough information for now? Bye. Another little teaser for Talking Funny. The edit is a bit manic and gives the impression that we are laughing like four idiots for 45 minutes. This is not the case - there are lots of rich in-depth discussions. I think they are trying to make it look fun and accessible. Which it is, but I think it's also really insightful if you're into comedy in a big way too. I have wasted my time on these last few sentences; you'll either watch it or not. Like it or not. Nothing I've said here will make the slightest bit of difference. Still, I started this fucking stupid blog, so... Here's the poster. 
Oh come on! You must like that? Have a great weekend. Oh and by the way HBO just told me they are commissioning a 3rd season of The Ricky Gervais Show. Have a fucking great weekend actually. Feeling the Rolling Stone love at the moment And this. Pretty sure the journalist that interviewed me wasn't a fan but the rest of the mag seems cool. Not that you're cool if you like me and not cool if you don't of course. I just mean... I was trying to be cool. Cool? Cool. I'm trying to bring back the word cool. Good job on getting Karl's phone message out there. It's better than the poster campaign. That seems so old school now. ("School" has all the letters of "cool" in it and some left over. Cool.) (Old 'Skool" or "skule" on the other hand has all the letters chosen by a thick talentless mong) LOL. It's jokes isn't it? Well Comedy. Hope you like the next episode of The Ricky Gervais Show. Tell your friends to watch too. If the figures keep going up or even stay the same I'm pretty sure we'll get a third series. Yes I know I don't usually want to do a third series but this is different. It's all about the gumpish little mongo chimp. If you get my drift. Week one hundred and sixty-three - March/April 2011 That's the last time I eat cheese just before bed. Dreamt that a sea lion told me to dance with an elephant. So I did. Mental. Karl got back from Alaska today. It was the first trip of An Idiot Abroad 2 : The Bucket List. He's not happy. It's not what he expected at all. Still too late now. He signed the contract and cashed the cheque. What a fucking twonk. Why did he trust us again? I have the angriest message saved on my phone. Really. He's so angry, and sick and tired that... it's hilarious. I may post it online. Hope you enjoyed the all-day marathon on The Science Channel and the new episode of the animation on HBO. We've now had 300 million downloads for The Ricky Gervais Show. Not bad is it? Here's to season 3 of that, because there certainly won't be a season 3 of An Idiot Abroad. He's not that much of a mong, surely? 
Been answering awkward questions all day about my Libya campaign. US and UK ships and submarines in the Mediterranean have unleashed at least 161 Tomahawk cruise missiles from their arsenals to the tune of $225 million, the Pentagon said. US warplanes have dropped dozens of bombs with price-tags of tens of thousands of dollars apiece. A downed Air Force F-15 fighter jet will cost more than $30 million to replace. No-Fly Zone Over Libya: $30 Million to $100 Million Per Week. Why the fuck did I offer to pay for all this? I never dreamt it would be this expensive. Still mustn't grumble. Started casting Life's Too Short this week too. So much fun. First you get frustrated because the exact character in your head doesn't walk through the door immediately. But if you never just settle for second best then eventually they do. Or even someone better than you imagined. Mackenzie Crook springs to mind. Gareth was originally going to be quite a beefy guy, but when Mackenzie started doing those lines about being a trained killer it was hilarious. Maybe I'll give you a piece of Office trivia each day leading up to its 10 year anniversary. OK, did you know... Only 3 people were in both The Office and Extras? Me, Steve and... Steve Brody. (Brent's booking agent in The Office Special and Maggie's estate agent in The Extras Special.) Remember that. It could win you 8 pints in a pub quiz one day. Don't forget to tune into The Science Channel for the all day marathon of An Idiot Abroad. Friday. All day. Obviously. And The Ricky Gervais Show on HBO. And go for a walk. It's good for you. Have a nice weekend. Whoops! I told you all the wrong time for The Ricky Gervais Show on E4. Sorry about that. They moved it earlier because it was doing well but forgot to tell me. It will be at 10.30 from now on. You seemed to have found it anyway. Good job. And thank you for spreading the word in both The UK and The US. The better it does the more likely it is that a third season is commissioned. That will be the most episodes of anything we've ever done. In fact it already is. (If you don't count The American Office of course.) 
Oh, and thanks for tweeting and blogging about Talking Funny too. Again, if it goes down well I'll do another one. 
We've basically got first drafts of all seven episodes of Life's Too Short now. Yes seven! That make's it eligible for The Golden Globes. 
Yes I know The President of The Hollywood Foreign press said I could never win another one, but he was just a bit upset that I said, in front of 200,000,000 viewers world-wide, that I'd "just helped him off the toilet and popped his teeth in." 
He's forgiven me by now hasn't he? He's the boss. You've got to tease the boss at "The Firm"s do" haven't you? Maybe not. If you're in The UK, don't forget to watch the new episode of The Ricky Gervais Show on E4 11pm Tuesday or Channel 4 11.30 Thursday. Please remind your best chums. Here's a clip. And here's a review from its US airing. We're on episode 11 this Friday in the States of course. Oh, and finally... Another exclusive clip of Talking Funny at the wonderful Huffington Post. Tweeters of America, Please tell your countrymen of two things... 1. The entire first season of An Idiot Abroad is being shown on The Science Channel April 1st. 2. Talking Funny with Chris Rock, Jerry Seinfeld, Louis CK and yours truly premieres on HBO, April 22nd. Here's a sneak peek Week one hundred and sixty-two - March 2011 Did a bit of writing for this season's finale of The Office. So much fun. There are lots of cynics (or maybe just people not in the actual business of making TV shows) asking the question, "Oh why don't they just axe The Office?" I of course pulled the plug on the original version after a measly seven or so hours of television. I stand by that decision and believe it's part of the reason why it, and the franchise in general, has been so successful ever since. So why isn't the American version afforded the same reverence? I suppose it has gone on a very long time and the loss of Steve Carell could mean the end of an era, but let me explain something; In the US TV industry, a show as successful as The Office will never stop. Here's why. If you can keep going for about 70 episodes you can get a low level syndication. That is, sell the series you've already made and been paid for to a second broadcaster at 100% profit. The real magic number though is about 100 episodes. Then you can strip the show across 4 days a week at a given time for about 6 months a year. (We're on about 150 episodes at the moment and have another season commissioned.) 200 episodes means you can do this the whole year and then start again. This can be done on more than one channel of course, and in as many countries as will take it. One network alone could pay $100 million to show the reruns. Now ask that question again; "Oh why don't they just axe The Office?" Seems like a silly question now doesn't it? ******************************************* Congratulations to Louis CK for beating me to Best Stand-up at The US Comedy Awards. Greatly deserved. It's about time that fat bald ginger cunt caught a break. He's amazing on Talking Funny by the way. When The Office is 10, I'll be 50. 
How the fuck did that happen? The 20 year-old on the left is thinking, "I hope I don't live long enough to look like that old cunt on the right." But luckily, the old cunt on the right is thinking, "at least I don't look like that poncey little prat on the left." I don't know whether that suggests that everything changes or nothing changes. But I love what Muhammed Ali said on the subject... "The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life." But at least his eyesight must have held up.
This is my biog on The Discovery Channel website. (Yes I know it's over the top and ridiculously flattering but that's not the point.) The point is that as I read it, I realised that on the 9th of July it will be ten years since The Office first aired. How time flies. I wonder if we'll get a day off like we are for the royal wedding. Just a thought. Maybe that knighthood? Who knows? Anyway, maybe pop that in your diary; and when you get up that day thank the baby Jesus for helping me come up with David Brent. (Oh, and it's 300 million downloads now for The Ricky Gervais Show. Just sayin'.) So this is out there... "Ricky Gervais, Will Arnett to guest star on 'The Office' season finale" This is out there too... "Johnny Depp and Jerry Seinfeld set to guest star on new Ricky Gervais series" The Depp bit is true. The Seinfeld bit isn't, and I assume the rumour came from this... Oh, and please stick this in your calendar. Here's that article I was talking about. (Thanks to Luke who sent it to my agent.) As I said, that was the first review of The Office we ever read. Still, we can laugh about it now. Actually we laughed about it then. Now I have to find the one that said that The Extras Xmas Special was "Sub Dickens" Ha ha. Anyway on to new projects now for the haters to hate... Talking Funny will premiere on HBO on 22nd of April. Remember it's not a comedy show, it's a show about comedy. And it's scripted like our podcasts and audiobooks. (Joking.) (Yeah I know YOU know I was joking but there are some people out there without the sarcasm gene.) Talking of which, apparently The Ricky Gervais Show has been downloaded over 300 million times. Thank you. (If you haven't heard them yet I must warn you they are NOT as good as Charles Dickens.) Week one hundred and sixty-one - March 2011 I've been trying to find the review that Victor Lewis Smith gave the first episode of The Office. (Mackenzie reminded me of it at dinner and told me he's been searching for it for years.) It was the first review we ever read and it was amazing. At one point when he was saying how bad it was he said something like 'Gervais even fluffs his lines.' Ha ha. I did find something else by him though. He's actually reviewing a different show but has another pop at The Office. It's ten years old so you can judge how good his predictions were. "Despite the massive hype that greeted the start of The Office, 54 million people in Great Britain didn't watch the first episode, and more than 55 million didn't watch the second. Having received virtually no pre-publicity whatsoever, Look Around You probably started out last night with 56 million not watching, but I'd be prepared to bet that its audience will grow steadily, while The Office's ratings continue to fall." Is it too late to take him up on that bet?. Ha ha. (He's right about how good 'Look Around You' was though. Even the website made me laugh out loud.) Another interesting review of The Ricky Gervais Show on HBO. That was episode 9 of season 2 in the US. Episode 10 is a corker. Leg Rubbing and Tic Tacs. Episode 3 in the UK this week... So I got two parcels today. One was the new iPad 2 from its genius inventor Jony Ive (it's a work of art). And the other was a pair of signed boxing gloves from Mike Tyson with a message that read "I want to be on your show". Amazing.  It's so weird, because not only had I recently been watching some of his old fights on YouTube, (at his peak the most devestating fighter of all time) but this week I also watched the first episode of his new show about pigeon racing. It's fantastic. Beautifully shot, inspirational and with some wonderful New York characters. I know... I'm a very lucky boy. Just been to dinner with Mackenzie Crook too. What a lovely man. And when we got in the car to come home 'Handbags and Gladrags' started playing. He thought I'd put on a CD. It was on the radio. I promise. Magic 104.9. Check the log. About 10.15pm it was. Have a great weekend. Did some video bits for the Science Channel today, talking about An Idiot Abroad 2. Karl was on amazing form. At one point he said he's not going to Japan now. I started winding him up about being scared. Steve joined in. Karl went mental at him; bringing up the time when Steve went home to his mum for a week with a sore throat. If it doesn't make the cut I'll try to get that clip. We're out to dinner tonight with Karl and Suzanne. I will of course take notes. Don't forget to watch Comic Relief. Or Sky+ it and fast forward to our little bit at about midnight I think. Ha ha. If you think I haven't got the right attitude, just wait to hear what Karl has to say about it. Hope you liked episode 2 of the second season of The Ricky Gervais Show in the UK. It's repeated Thursday on Channel 4 if you missed it. Another instalment. It takes me quite a while to wind Karl up enough to get his killer put down at the end, but it was worth it. I'll never wear that jacket again. He did me up like a right kipper and no mistake. Thank You. The Ricky Gervais Gervais Guide To Comic Relief was downloaded 1.2 million times in its first week. Fucking amazing. Cheers to everyone who listened, tweeted, and listened again. Haven't played you a tune for a while. Here's a great version of a great song. Peace. Nice summing up of season 1 of An Idiot Abroad in the States. Here's a little interview we did for the launch of The Ricky Gervais Show in The UK. It's all go. Getting ready to film Life's Too Short and Talking Funny airs on HBO next month. I know, I know, it's quite incredible that sitting around laughing with mates can be considered a job. It's not my fault is it? Week one hundred and sixty - March 2011 Hope you voted for me. Please vote for my pal Zack Galifianakis too. I'm currently working on something with him and I want him to feel good about himself at work. If I wasn't nominated myself I'd be asking for you to vote for Louis. Obviously. Aziz is fantastic too. I've got no chance have I? Same with this one. If I wasn't nominated I'd want Basil Brush or Mutley. I feel a real affinity for both of them. But come on, it has to be me surely. Remember, it doesn't say it can't be the loudest most annoying laugh too. Excellent. As long as we're clear. Here's the official link to that interview we did (the other one stopped working for some reason). Enjoy the last episode of An Idiot Abroad on the Science Channel. Please download the Ricky Gervais Guide to Comic Relief. And have a great weekend. Hope you enjoyed The Ricky Gervais Show back in Blighty. I wonder if Clive Warren was watching. Here's that interview we did for the Channel 4 website by the way. It's already up to episode 8 this week on HBO. And of course it's the final episode of An Idiot Abroad on Science. But the good news is there's a new series on the way. Good news for you - not Karl, obviously. SOACLMBO (sitting on a couch laughing my bollocks off) The first episode of The Ricky Gervais Show seemed to go down nicely. If you missed it you can watch it this Thursday on Channel 4. Here's a little interview we did. We recorded a little bit for Comic Relief Night today. Karl still said exactly what he thought of the charity of course. Perfect. I'll try to get some timings so you don't have to sit through fucking hours just to see a few minutes of the little chimp. Wrong attitude? Wait till you see what Karl says. 
photo: Rich Hardcastle Thanks to everyone who downloaded our Comic Relief podcast. Hope you enjoyed it. Or, hope you ranted to your nan that it's all scripted or something. Either pleases us obviously. The same goes for Episode 1 of the all new Ricky Gervais show on E4. If you miss it Tuesdays, it's repeated Thursdays on Channel 4 by the way. In other good news... We started production properly today on An Idiot Abroad 2. Think it could be even better than series one. You'll be the judge of that. So as An Idiot Abroad draws to a close in the US we start production on season two this week in the UK. Karl is being fitted for some very warm boots tomorrow for his first trip. Only the best for my mate. Here's a little taster for American viewers for the last episode of season one on the Science Channel this Saturday. Talking of second seasons... Don't forget to watch the all new Ricky Gervais Show this week on E4 or Channel 4. It's over half way through in the States but that's only fair as the UK got An Idiot Abroad first. Come on, share and share alike. Everyone in the world can listen to the free Ricky Gervais Guide to Comic Relief at the same time though. Peace. Did a bit of promo for everything today. Here's me with Greg James 
Listen here. So here's our little contribution to Red Nose Day - The Ricky Gervais Guide to Comic Relief. [iTunes link] 
Please Tweetify, Face-Off and Up-Space. Or just tell one or two real friends via your mouth in the ancient way of the human. Week one hundred and fifty-nine - February/March 2011 So Karl was on fantastic form last night at the press screening of The Ricky Gervais Show. He's so much more relaxed than last year. Last year he was a bit nervous when he was moaning and complaining for 40 minutes. This year he whinged so confidently. We filmed a little interview for the Channel 4 website too. I'll link to it when it's ready obviously. In the meantime, here's Steve all by himself. Sorry, have I died or something? First this... 
And then this... 
I'm very flattered though. Off to do a press Q and A with Steve and Karl now. I'll report back tomorrow. Oh God. You couldn't write this. Although I wish I had. OK. I will host The Golden Globes again, AND the Emmys, AND The Oscars if I can do it with Charlie Sheen. I mean it. I'd write some gags like always, intro the presenters, then after each acceptance speech I'd just chat to Charlie, who would just be sitting in an arm chair smoking, about what he thought of the result. He'd just say what's on his incredible mind. It would be fucking amazing. I'd call his agent but he hasn't got one. Do you have his dealer's number? Oh fuck, he's clean isn't he? If you bump into him in the street or when he's being dragged around the interview circuit being exploited in the name of "news" tell him he's got a new job. Talking of incredible minds, we've got the press screening tomorrow for the new Ricky Gervais Show on Channel4/E4. I can't wait. Karl hates it. That's when he's at his best. Hope you had a good weekend and enjoyed all the blurred genitals in An Idiot Abroad. They weren't blurred when they were inches from Karl's face of course. Ha ha. But as the wise man himself once said, "if you can't look a knob in the face there's something wrong." He's in Peru this Saturday. Before that of course is another brand new episode of The Ricky Gervais Show on HBO this Friday. (Possibly my favourite of the series) OK. I have some good news. We recorded The Ricky Gervais Guide to Comic Relief today. It will of course be free. We'll upload it in good time for Red Nose Day as part of the awareness campaign. Ha Ha. Amazingly some people thought that I wrote that intro to The Oscars, in the hope it might actually be used. Hilarious. I am still shocked by the existence of such stupidity in the world. As if I seriously thought if would ever be considered. It's not like I sent it to the academy or even imagined they would read it. I did it for a laugh on my blog. Here it is again. Enjoy. It's a joke. Oh and and I'm not really thinking of taking over Egypt or Libya by the way.
Ha ha. Can't believe they actually printed this. I am the puppet master. Talking of which... Got sent this for Ollie to get her own back on: 
Thanks to "Cats with Thumbs". Here's Karl in this week's Ricky Gervais Show on HBO. And here he is in Brazil this week on Science. Have a great weekend. Had a meeting with Karl today about various things. We start recording bits for An Idiot Abroad soon and he's getting very inquisitive. It sounds harsh, but we have to keep things from him until he's on camera. That's when the magic happens. Trying to persuade him to do something for Comic Relief too. He says he's done enough for charity. So have me and Steve, for that little mong. I usually get my own way. We'll see. Another Dilkington weekend stateside. There's a brand new Ricky Gervais Show on HBO this Friday and a brand new An Idiot Abroad on Science this Saturday. Oh, and good luck to James Franco and Anne Hathaway at The Oscars on Sunday. I know how nervous they must be right now. They will do an absolutely fantastic job and don't need my help, but I've written a little opening in case they have a few minutes to fill.
As you may have read, The Office has just about completed its first phase of syndication. One report said that this is the reason I can be rude to powerful people in Hollywood. No, it's because it's fun. But yeh, I see their point. Ha ha. I've podcasted the post-globes CNN interview by the way. [iTunes link] I know me and Piers Morgan are great to look at so I'm really sorry it's only audio. My second appearance on The Simpsons aired last night on Fox. [reviews from TV Squad and NYMag] Last time I had to write it, fly out to LA, do a read through and record it with all the cast. This time I went into a studio in Hampstead and ad libbed like a mother fucker for 20 minutes. Nice. Talking of iconic cartoons... please bid for my little doodle in an auction for Parkinsons. 
Week one hundred and fifty-eight - February 2011 Wow! I think there must be a leak at my accountants... They are of course spot on. I know it sounds a lot, but remember, I donate a lot of this to good causes. (The Inland Revenue mainly.) Now this is out, I will have to get my family a million scratch cards each for Christmas. I have decided to use the rest of the money to take over Libya. 
(I know I said I was going to start with Egypt but Karl said it was awful.) Don't forget to watch a brand new episode of The Ricky Gervais Show on HBO. And a brand new episode of An Idiot Abroad on the Science Channel. This week we send Karl to Egypt. Should be nice. Ha ha. Have a great weekend. Did a bit of press today for The Ricky Gervais Show coming soon to The UK. Karl did a bit too, but got annoyed when a journalist said something like, "but you're not really that thick are you?" Ha ha. Brilliant. Talking of annoying people, someone has translated my atheism essay into Spanish so the rest of the Americas can be pissed off too. The tweet is on. Monkey News 
So E4 is showing The Ricky Gervais Show Season 2 on Tuesdays at 11.00 from March 8th, and C4 is showing it Thursdays at 11.30 from March 10th. So two days after basically. Also, C4 will be repeating the final episode of series 1 at 11.35 on Thursday March 3rd (a week before the channel premiere of the new series.) A new clip of the new series is available as a podcast. [iTunes link] If you're in the US you get the 6th episode this week. Who would have thought that one day Karl would be a global star? Here he is, back when he was just a mong. A great day writing Life's Too Short. It's really shaping up. Thanks for asking. My HBO Stand-up Special has been nominated for a US Comedy Award. This could make up for me losing out on the Emmy last year to Chris Rock. However, I fear it won't, as this year I'm up against Louis CK. Not only is he my favourite stand-up of the year but also a very good friend. So I wish the big, fat, bald, useless, ginger cunt the best of luck. From one weird egg-headed chum to another... Karl's Darwin 
Surely the most compelling proof yet of our shared ancestry with chimps. This is me congratulating the new host of The Golden Globes... 
OK, here's the full story. Yes I talk to tramps OK? But then, as I've said many times, all of my friends are a bit odd. This guy would definitely not rank as the weirdest chum I have. And even though he hasn't got a lot of cash I bet he wouldn't let me do this. Ah, those were the days. Oh, and this hasn't been talked about enough for my liking. There are still people in the world blissfuly un-annoyed by me. Please tweet it to them immediately. LOL... BASM. (Laughing out loud... but accidentally shitting myself.) Week one hundred and fifty-seven - February 2011 I feel a new poster campaign coming on... 
Photo Rich Hardcastle He's always fucking moaning. Don't forget to watch Karl in Mexico on Discovery Science this Saturday across America. Here we are talking about a deleted scene. Oh and there's a brand new episode of The Ricky Gervais Show on HBO tomorrow night. Have a great weekend. Finally watched Harry Brown. Absolutely loved it. Probably my favourite British movie since This is England. Thanks for asking. Cemetery Junction is great too. Forget who wrote and directed it, but you'd love it. The saga continues by the way. It's been a few day of meetings and admin. That happens now and again. You suddenly realize you haven't written a word of comedy - just talk, emails and signing documents. I've been planning An Idiot Abroad, Talking Funny, The Ricky Gervais Show, and a couple of movie ideas, but meanwhile we've been trying to finish writing Life's Too Short. Also, The Office is well into syndication in the States (which is why I can say what the fuck I like and annoy people at awards shows... ha ha. Only joking... I've always been annoying, I know.) and we're developing it in a few new countries at the moment too. Still. It's better than working. Had a little meeting with NBC about various things and recommended Will Arnett for a regular in The Office. Thoughts? I think he's amazing. Had a chat with Jerry Seinfeld. We were talking about cultural reference changes for his London gigs, and half way through he panicked and said, "How do I know you're not stitching me up, and I'll be saying the most offensive things?" I'm getting a bad reputation. It's like these reviews that say that I bully Karl. He's a 38 year old man. He's buying his third house and we've just started a production company together to make An Idiot Abroad II. Jesus fucking Christ I wish some cunt would bully me like that. Had a very funny meeting with the little chimp today actually. He's asking a lot more questions about the trips than he did last year. I just want to burst out laughing all the time. He wants a guarantee of nicer toilets. Such a lovely simple man. This week's episode on Discovery Science sees him in Mexico. I have decided to pull something even bigger than pissing off Hollywood in front of the world. I am going to take over Egypt. I've always wanted a little dictatorship and I think this would be a good starting point. I wouldn't want to run it for long, Ideally I'd like something in Europe eventually, but you've got to start somewhere right? I've bought the outfit and everything. This is me in my bunker, I mean study.
I had to buy all the paintings and stuff out of my own money, but in a dictatorship everything is free. That's true of Hollywood actually, but there you have to have your picture taken with it and tell Ryan Seacrest who gave it to you. Fuck that. Talking of politics and Egyptian things, here's a clip from my Politics DVD featuring an Egyptian thing. Week one hundred and fifty-six - January/February 2011 Recorded another couple of episodes of Family Guy. So much fun. All my scenes are with the great Peter Griffin. An absolute joy. Will Arnett and Mitch Hurwitz were in town doing PR for Arrested Development on FX UK... 
Yes. That is what great comic minds get up to in their spare time! Problem? We went to The Ivy with Karl and Suzanne yesterday. He had a beef pudding. I don't think he could be more northern. Then he complained that he had heartburn this morning. Gump. 
He's going down a storm in The States though. Don't forget to watch this week. [review in The Montreal Gazette] Planned some more pranks, I mean trips, for series 2 today. He'll never do a third I can guarantee that. Enjoy the new episode of The Ricky Gervais Show on HBO tonight. Have a great weekend. Started planning "An Idiot Abroad : The Bucket List" today. I can't tell you any of the details in case Karl reads this blog or it gets reported anywhere, but one idea made me and Steve laugh for about an hour. It's like that thing when you discover you can do what you want when you're dreaming. If you can think up some scenario and take Karl out of his comfort zone he never disappoints. It's quite incredible really. Thank you to all the lovely American chimpophiles who are watching series one at the moment on Discovery Science Channel. What do you mean, "why is this nonsense on The Science Channel when it contains absolutely no science?" This is exactly the same question asked many times by critics of my last stand-up DVD "Science". I will give the same answer I gave then... "Oh shut the fuck up." OK, I didn't give that answer, but I was thinking it. I'm always thinking it if I'm being honest. Ha ha. I mean LOL. Here's a bit of science. Please tweet and annoy the world. I've discovered how fucking easy that is. ROFLAW. (Rolling on the floor laughing and wanking.) So you may have read that we are doing another series of An Idiot Abroad. This is true. You may also have read that I am hosting next year's Golden Globes. This is not true. Not yet anyway. The TV show organisers said they were happy with everything and asked me to not rule out a third gig. However, it is not entirely up to them. The Hollywood Foreign Press and various other committees need to meet and agree. I have no idea if they want me back again. It depends whether they care about fifty delicate egos in the room or the 200 million people watching at home who want a laugh. Also, even if they did want me back, at the moment I'm pretty sure I shouldn't do it. But I'll tell you this. If they do invite me back and I accept, I'm going to pull exactly the same shit again or even worse. Once again, everyone has been warned. This is good. Congratulations to Steve Buscemi for winning best actor in a drama series at the Screen Actors Guild Awards. 
Boardwalk Empire is my favourite new drama. Thanks for asking. Looked at a little theatre today where I might do a regular experimental comedy work-in-progress type thing. Merchant said he'd join in. Thinking of making it walk-up only, to fuck up touts. Could work. Or it might rain. Who knows? Who cares? Thanks for asking. That's my new catchphrase. It will be a whole night of catchphrases actually. And funny voices and wigs and shit. This will save us actually writing any comedy. That's irony by the way. Thanks for asking. It's already annoying. But catchy. Oh, what do you think of "The Stem Cell" as the name of the club? Oh thanks. Very Kind. Week one hundred and fifty-five - January 2011 Don't forget to watch the third instalment of The Ricky Gervais Show tonight on HBO. Hopefully we'll know soon if we're going to do a third series or not. This will of course be a first for us. The reason we stopped The Office and Extras and everything else we've done early, is because of the fact that we do everything ourselves and we don't want to share the burden, lower the quality or bore the audience before we get bored ourselves. With the animation, we've already done most of the work, the visuals make it even better and it is impossible for me to get bored with Karl. So...... (that was me doing a little Brent as a tribute to his little resurrection in The Office last night on NBC) I can just imagine people going "OK we'll give him another chance... he was offensive at the Globes, doing impressions of girls gagging while wanking old millionaires, and dissing God but I doubt he'll do anything awful on my favourite TV show The Office... Oh good, he's doing a Chinaman called Ho Lee Fuk..." Talking of funny foreigners... It's the second episode of An Idiot Abroad on Discovery Science tomorrow. Karl goes to India. He doesn't like it in case you haven't guessed. Have a great weekend. This is the best website ever. (13.75 billion years) I think it may actually be funnier than the bible itself. The best bits are when they "scientifically" prove stuff. Amazing. How is this stuff not insane? What do you have to believe to be considered mental these days? Absolutely hilarious though. Talking of which, it's going to be another Pilki Weekend Stateside. A brand new Ricky Gervais Show, Friday, HBO and An Idiot Abroad on Discovery Science this Saturday. Tell your friends. (Unless you're watching the Science channel on a Saturday night in which case tell your mum.) In six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea and all that is in them, and rested on the seventh day" "For with the Lord one day is like a thousand years and a thousand years like one day" Have you seen this? Yeh thought so. You probably haven't seen this though. I'll open with that at The Emmys. Had a meeting today with Steve and Karl about An Idiot Abroad 2. Stay tuned. Series one got twice the channel average on Discovery Science in The US by the way. Could have been due to the little extra publicity I got last week. OJ Simpson didn't get this many column inches. (No cock pun intended.) The second series of The Ricky Gervais Show got its highest ratings ever too. But that was two days before the Globes so I'm hoping that was a growing fan base. Thanks to everyone who tweeted about the bald monkey and told their friends. Now how can I get Karl to host a global awards show. Fuck me how good would that be? Should have a date for season two in the UK this week. E4 then C4 we think. Last year it was the other way round and E4 got higher ratings than C4 eventually. Karl is getting recognised more and it's stressing him a bit. I've got to back off for a while so he doesn't become a recluse. That would spoil everyone's fun. Luckily he wants to buy another house, which could work in our favour. Leave it with me. I played a little joke on him (for a change). I got the art department to mock up a fake poster for An Idiot Abroad in the US. During the photo shoot I made him jump by screaming and prodding his ribs. He spasmed and made a face like a duck shitting itself. We then digitally removed me from the photo leaving this... 
Oh God, why wasn't this the real billboard? Back at work writing Life's Too Short. The press have quietened down a bit regarding my "controversial" Golden Globes stint. It was only mentioned a few thousand times today. This is good though. The comments at the end are funny. No one makes fun of Tim Allen and gets away with it! Here's me and Tim having a laugh about it after the show by the way... 
A very funny man. Week one hundred and fifty-four - January 2011 Here's the thing I did with Piers Morgan in case you missed it.[part 1] and [part 2] It's actually one of my favourite interviews ever. The response to the Globes has been mental quite frankly. It's been discussed on every chat show and news show for a week across the US. Thank you to all the hosts and guests and everyone I've met on the street who had such lovely things to say. I can't find these people who were supposedly offended. Who are they? Do they actually exist? Anyway, thank you Piers, thank you America. And thank you Reason and Freedom of Speech. Have a great weekend. In case you missed it. Spent the last couples of days working with Christopher Guest on a secret project. So secret we don't know what it is yet. We basically took stupid pictures of each other on the iPhone. Now that's what I call work. Don't forget to watch the second episode of The Ricky Gervais Show - Friday at 9 on HBO. Did Piers Morgan Tonight. Think it should be an interesting show. You'll be the judge of that, I know. This is out there; 'Gervais reclaims his Office job' Blink and you'll miss it, but just a little thanks to Steve Carell. A pleasure to work with the great man. Cheers. Thanks to the twitterverse, the blogosphere, all the journos and the coolest stars for coming to my rescue. It was heartwarming to realise I wasn't losing my mind. Some reactions nearly had me believing I'd gone too far too. Nearly. Can't wait for the people who thought it was over the top to see my stand-up shows. Fuck me, they will shit themselves. Oh, and fans, take this opportunity to tell the world about Karl Pilkington. Tweet about that fucking head now! All new Ricky Gervais Show this Friday on HBO and An Idiot Abroad on Science Channel 22nd Jan. A genuine thanks by the way for all your support. Cheers. Back in New York. From 80 degrees to 20 in a few hours. Still it was nice to get a bit of winter sun.
OK. I can explain. Ellen gave me them and ask me to wear them for the Golden Globes. How could I refuse. This is me before I popped on the old tux. See. It's not weird at all is it? I enjoyed the Globes more this year. I think I had better gags. More along the lines of the Mel Gibson one last year. Obviously the rumour that the organizers stopped me going out on stage for an hour is rubbish. I did every link I was scheduled to do. The reason why the gaps were uneven is because when I got the rundown I was allowed to choose who I presented to. I obviously chose the spots that I had the best gags for. They couldn't move around the order but I could move around however I wanted. All the same conspiracy theories as last year too... "So and so was offended"... "hasn't been invited back yet"... exactly the same as last time. "Paul McCartney was furious"... no he wasn't. And nor was Tim Allen and Tom Hanks. I was drinking with them after. Why do people have to embellish? They're allowed to say they hated it. They're allowed to say they didn't find it funny, that it was tasteless, over the top, or whatever. But why do they speculate and make stuff up? Don't worry, I know the answer. Because it's more interesting than "it went fine and some people won some awards and then went to a party". But that's all that happened. Actually, I see what they mean. Boring. So here's what really happened. Bruce Willis and Sly Stallone started a fight with me but Alec Baldwin and Mark Walberg stepped in and helped me out. That's what happened. Week one hundred and fifty-three - January 2011 Had a fantastic day on The Muppet Movie. 
That's me and Billy Crystal by the way. Not Stadler and Waldorf. Did Conan's new show on TBS. Great fun as usual. Filming with the Muppets today. It's going to be about 80 degrees and I'm in a Tux. Still - mustn't grumble. Oh, and of course I didn't spend £200 on fucking face cream. Now if you'll excuse me I'm off to have my testicles waxed for the Golden Globes. (That's not true either by the way.) Now I know how Karl felt when we had him kidnapped. A year ago my previous fatter heart would have just stopped. (Yeah, I know it's not as bad as having someone kidnapped but I shat myself nonetheless. So did Karl, but that was the local water.) OK, so I did about 25 satellite interviews across America for breakfast news and stuff. Surprise, surprise it was a beautiful day in L.A. 
Had a little walk round Rodeo Drive. Tried on a $250,000 watch. Mental. The guy in charge said, "Mr Gervais can I show you a watch that's 1 of 10 in the world?" I said, "sure." He got it out and put it on my wrist. I said, "It's beautiful; how much is that?" He said, "$250,000." I said, "Carefully take it off my wrist." Left the shop just as one of those celebrity spotting tour buses was going by. Now this is absolutely true. The people started waving at me and as I waved back, the driver wound down his window and shouted, "Karl Pilkington's got a head like a fucking orange." Amazing. Karl is still having a go at Steve's looks... Off to L.A. now. I'll be writing jokes on the plane, until I get bored when I will watch a film I would never dream of watching under any other circumstances. I watched "Jumper" and "The Time Traveler's Wife" once. The terrible thing is I quite enjoyed both of them. Don't forget to tell your friends about the season premiere of The Ricky Gervais Show this Friday on HBO. Cheers. Lots of walking this weekend. Lovely cold, sunny days in Hampstead. Much of the time spent wishing we had other people's dogs. Can't really have one at the moment; living between The US and UK. Cats are cool being looked after by anyone but dogs are more like little friends I think. What I'm saying is I know I miss my cat more than it misses me, but my dog would sit at the window for a week looking at its watch. 
Off to L.A. now for The Golden Globes and The Muppet Movie. Also doing a few chat shows and interviews. Then a few days off in New York. (Apart from this.) We've had some lovely reviews for the second season of The Ricky Gervais Show. Hope you like it too. It's definitely better than season one. Not in terms of audio but the whole feel and the direction of the animation is so much funnier and more ambitious. You'll be the judge of that. Anyway, while I'm plugging various shows, hosting award ceremonies and appearing in kids' movies, Karl is on holiday. At least no insects will die by the pool that week. Not on his watch. Week one hundred and fifty-two - January 2011 Ha ha. He always wanted to be a plumber. It was so much fun doing the satellite link. Karl's earpiece broke off in his ear and he couldn't get it out. Fucking amazing. He said he quite enjoyed the interview actually, as he couldn't see the audience. It was like radio with a webcam in the studio basically. Perfect. If you live in The United States you can watch the first episode of season 2 of The Ricky Gervais Show from today on all HBO platforms. HBO.com and iTunes. If you don't live in The United States... it's not my fault is it? Have a great weekend. Did a day of promo for The Science Channel. 
Karl loved it as you can see. You may have read I'm the lead in the new Hollywood animated movie of The Wind in The Willows. I am playing Mole and in true Daniel Day Lewis style will be living under my lawn for the next few months to really get into the role. In other animated news I recently recorded a guest appearance in Family Guy. It was absolutely fucking brilliant working with Seth, and he let me go crazy with ad libbing too. A new highlight in my career. Next week I'm filming my cameo in the new Muppet Movie. I am living a little sick toddler's dream. So this year there's the new Ricky Gervais Show, Family Guy, The Simpsons again, A mole and a Puddloflaj. No one will see me. I may as well get fat again. Did some interstitials with Steve for "The American Office" on Comedy Central. I always forget how much fun it is just riffing with Merch like the old days. I suppose we've taken a back seat in recent years. We sort of started "leading from the back" with the animation and An Idiot Abroad and Cemetery Junction. We keep talking about maybe performing as a double act one day but we never get around to it. Anyway who cares right? Well, I do, and it's my blog. Wrote a few more jokes for the Golden Globes. (You'll be the judge of that.) A full day of US promo tomorrow for An Idiot Abroad on Discovery Science. In the morning we have photo shoots and trailers then in the evening, the three of us do a live satellite interview for The TCAs. Basically all the journalists in America crammed into one room. The whole country covered in one hour. Perfect. Talking of covering the entire country... I am sorry if you are seeing this everywhere at the moment in the land of the free. 
That's one big fucking gob. I'm getting you back for beating us in the War of Independence. Can't get rid of us that easily. Hope you've voted for me in this poll. Why not? It's really important. At the moment I'm only 8th funniest thing ever. Not good enough. Actually it IS really important because it makes people on the internet angry. That's my job now. Please vote then sit back and watch the fall out. Like this for example. Apparently there might be loads of gods after all. My bad. LOL. GAL. GAAL (that's get an afterlife BTW. (by the way.)) Dear America, please rush out and buy the Complete First Season of The Ricky Gervais Show on DVD. Or just order it here. Catch up before season 2 starts on HBO on the 14th of January. 
I used the same photo on the poster as we used for An Idiot Abroad because I read a review that said it was annoying. LOL Talking of AIA (as we say in the biz) don't forget that it premieres in The States on Discovery Science on the 22nd of Jan. Could be Karl's biggest year yet. He'll be happy. LOLAMS. (That's "laughing out loud at my sarcasm" by the way. It can also be used as slang for breasts.) Had a great day writing with Steve. Yes I know it was a bank holiday but I do it all for you guys. You know that. (LOLAMS) (the first meaning) Week one hundred and fifty-one - December 2010/January 2011 The new year brings with it the lead up to award season. The Golden Globes are only 2 weeks away. No pressure. I think I've got some good stuff together already. Better than last year, which is always the point of doing something twice I suppose. Finished the very rough edit of Talking Funny. It's really good and interesting but I'm worried it's quite fringe. It's not that it's too "in" and self-indulgent but I think you've really got to be interested in the art of stand-up to enjoy it a lot. Also I'm worried that people may tune in expecting to see four professional comedians making jokes to make TV viewers laugh. There are funny bits and we make each other laugh quite a bit, but it's a show about comedy; not a comedy show. We get quite serious at points and often disagree with each other. Anyway. Watch it. Or don't. Warning: may contain the words "fuck"... and "cock"... and "rape" and "shit". To be honest it definitely does contain all those words. We also say "the N word" a few times. Well actually me and Jerry Seinfeld say "the N word", Chris Rock and Louis CK only ever say "Nigger." Worked on Life's Too Short with Steve. Did a phone interview for an article about 10 years of The Office. They asked me if I made new year's resolutions. I said I didn't. I can see the headline now... "Ricky Gervais: I'm perfect as I am." I'm getting cynical. Actually I quite like it in a perverse sort of way. The angrier people are the funnier it is. A mate called me today to tell me he'd overheard two women talking on a train. One women said that she liked Cemetery Junction and the other women said, "Oh I HATE Ricky Gervais... he ruined Extras for me." Ha ha. Brilliant. She must have seen it before I was involved and it was a lot better. I hope I ruined The Office and An Idiot Abroad and all my stand-up shows for her too. Amazing. I also intend to ruin all future projects. We're celebrating New Year with Karl and Suzanne. Or rather we are staying in and avoiding celebration. We're having sausage and mash. It was this time last year that I had 11 sausages and then decided I was going to get fit and not die. I suppose 2010 was the year I got fit. Maybe I do make new year's resolutions. Have a good one. My dear internetters. Cyberlings and Weberty friends. I have a new campaign to unite us as one. Let's not fight any more. Twitterers, Blogmeisters, and Facey Bookworms, come together in OUR Space. Give praise to your new Messiah... Half man, half Bod... Karl of Manchester. 
Spread the word of his return. The Ricky Gervais Show - The Second Coming - HBO Friday 14th January. Now back to less serious stuff. Comment of the day on The Wall Street Journal website. They are all funny, but If you don't laugh out loud at number 3 in the following list you have no sense of humour. Ready?............ 5:07 pm December 29, 2010 - Rob Wastman wrote: Why I DO believe in God. 1) Because as I look out over nature it is incomprehensible that it is all just some cosmic accident. 2) As I study human history especially biblical history, His hand is evident. 3) Jesus 4) My life has changed incredibly and miraculously since I started believing Him. 5) I have never found a better explanation for any of these things. 6) Science is but mankinds feeble attempt at understanding creation, "For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength." 1 Cor 1:25 Rob Wastman- Pastor Journey of Faith / Skatechurch Let's go through this list (I'm still laughing at number 3) 1. Quite. God making the universe out of nothing is definitely more probable than a cosmic accident. Who made God you moron? (Sorry I'm sick of being polite) 2. Isn't it fucking amazing that his hand is especially evident in BIBLE History. 3. Ha ha ha I've lightened up again 4. He was nice to you, and now you believe in him. Brilliant. 5. Really? You've checked the Bible... hmmm... where else could it be? 6. Why did God make us so shit? OK we've all had a bit of fun. Now I should address number 3 properly. This... The Jesus myth theory (also known as the Christ myth theory and the nonexistence hypothesis) is the idea that Jesus of Nazareth was not an historical person, but is a fictional or mythological character created by the early Christian community. Some proponents argue that events or sayings associated with the figure of Jesus in the New Testament may have been drawn from one or more individuals who actually existed, but that none of them were in any sense the founder of Christianity. The history of the idea can be traced to the French Enlightenment thinkers Constantin-François Volney and Charles François Dupuis in the 1790s. Notable proponents include Bruno Bauer in the 19th century, Arthur Drews in the 20th century, and more recently G.A. Wells, Alvar Ellegard, and Robert M. Price. The idea has come to public attention through the work of writers such as Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens, and the French philosopher Michel Onfray. Arguments used to support the theory emphasize the absence of extant reference to Jesus during his lifetime and the scarcity of non-Christian reference to him in the 1st century CE. Some proponents contend that Christianity emerged organically from Hellenistic Judaism, and draw on perceived parallels between the biography of Jesus and those of Greek, Egyptian, and other gods, especially those figuring in myths about dying and rising deities. Just a theory. Don't get angry. The truth is, it doesn't matter whether someone called Jesus actually existed or not. I think there probably was a bloke of that name knocking about some time or another. All I know is that no one can be a son of any god as no god exists. Just a theory. Don't get angry. Follow Karl instead. No really, follow him around it will annoy him. Please tell your friends to download the best of the first season of The Ricky Gervais Show. Nearly 2 hours of drivel completely FREE [iTunes link] Started writing some jokes for The Golden Globes. (You'll be the judge of that.) Really looking forward to it this year. I'll do a bit of promo that week too for The Ricky Gervais Show Season 2 and film a cameo for The Muppet Movie. Please spread the word across your lovely country they call America that you can now own The Complete First Season of The Ricky Gervais Show on DVD. Methods you can use are; 1. Talking via the mouth to a friend or stranger about the merits of the show and the possible enjoyment they could experience from purchasing and watching it. 2. Talk about it on a chat show. (This option is probably open to a very small percentage of people.) 3. Pay for an advertisement. (Again, this is a long shot.) 4. Tweet the news in a positive tone to the other 190 million users of Twitter. N.B. There is still a rumour going round that I slagged off Twitter and all its users. This is not true. I said it wasn't right for me. I even said it was a good networking device for people who like that sort of thing. I just couldn't get the hang of it to be honest. My problem. No one else's. The only type of users I "slagged off" were celebrities living their lives like open wounds on it to show off, and who hoped their quirky relationships were as interesting to everyone else as they assumed. I quite like the idea of Twitter actually and I think communication and the sharing of ideas can only be a good thing. I'm just not very good at doing that in 140 letters. I can't bring myself to type SOZ and LOL. Oh fuck! See what you made me do. Also An Idiot Abroad starts on Discovery Science in the US on Saturday 22nd January at 10pm. Hope you had a good Christmas. Now let's discuss the terms "Hope", "Good" and "Christmas". The comments page is still growing on the Wall Street Journal website . Rational people continue to come out of the wood work and warm my heart. There are also many polite, liberal believers who understand that being good is not related to believing in a god, which is also heart warming. But there are more and more angry Christians that find the fact that I don't believe in any god insulting and threatening. Why? Some don't even believe there is such a thing as "good" without god. One very popular belief is that religion invented morality. A fellow rationalist answered for me... "Good people do good things. Nobody needs religion to be good. Intelligent people understand the benefit of a moral compass and logically embrace positive attributes. Intelligent people do not need to be coerced with promises of an afterlife or threats with absurd punishments that even the cruelest human being wouldn't mete out. Humans have invented gods since the beginning of time. Faith is nothing but the belief and hope that something is true. Faith is an excuse to be irrational. Human rights are secular inventions. Science flies rockets into space, religion flies airplanes into office towers. Religion is responsible for more destruction, more war, more violence, more discrimination, more punishment, more inequity, more poverty, more persecution, more lies, more vengeance, more indignities, more human rights violations, more myths, more superstition, more divisiveness, and more intolerance than any other entity on earth. It is consistently and endlessly an obstacle for science. It warps minds, forbids questions, and is self-righteous. The scriptures and rules from every religion are condradictory, inconsistent, illogical, self-destructive, and completely nonsensical. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, and throw the rest in the garbage." Thank you, whoever you are. Couldn't have put it better myself. My argument was never a moral one. Merely an epistemological one. Is there a God or gods? That was it. I wasn't even saying I have proof of any god's or any other supernational being's non-existence. Only that why would I believe in such things that have absolutely no evidence to back them up? There's this strange default stance of "No one has ever proved God doesn't exist" True. no one has ever proved Santa doesn't exist. How can you? No one has ever proved Flanimals don't exist. Even some agnostics were offended that the term atheist exists at all. Maybe you shouldn't ask an agnostic the question "Is there a god?" because they will proudly say "I don't know." If you want them to get off the fence you need to ask them "Do YOU believe in God?" i.e. What's your best guess though?. Come on - grow a pair. If you get an answer out of them this will tell you whether they are really an atheist not wanting to be unpopular, or a believer not wanting to lose a philosophical debate. Some believers threatened by only having blind faith in the face of empirical evidence have pointed to scientists believing in god. 777 wrote "Famous Scientists Who Believed in God Nicholas Copernicus Sir Francis Bacon Galileo Galilei Rene Descartes Isaac Newton Michael Faraday William Thomson Kelvin Albert Einstein" Again, reason is never far away. Anonymous wrote Nice Appeal to Authority Fallacy you've got there, 777. And it's got LOTS of other problems. First, the first five lived during the Renaissance, when science was too primitive to have formulated a cosmology that didn't require a First Cause. Second, Descartes' "beliefs" were negligible. As his friend (and nominal Christian) Blaise Pascal wrote, "I cannot forgive Descartes; in all his philosophy, Descartes did his best to dispense with God. But Descartes could not avoid prodding God to set the world in motion with a snap of his lordly fingers; after that, he had no more use for God." That was a typical attitude towards "god" amongst scientists at the time. Third, Newton believed in some sort of god, but not in the Trinity or in the divinity of Jesus. He also believed very deeply in Alchemy. So, does that "prove" that all good scientists today should likewise believe in Alchemy, or that Alchemy must be real? Such are the problems with Appeals to Authorities like you've tried here. Fourth, there was no such person as "William Thompson Kelvin". William Thompson was the same person as Lord Kelvin. Fifth, Albert Einstein did NOT believe in god. He wrote "It was, of course, a lie what you read about my religious convictions, a lie which is being systematically repeated. I do not believe in a personal God and I have never denied this but have expressed it clearly. If something is in me which can be called religious then it is the unbounded admiration for the structure of the world so far as our science can reveal it." Einstein wasn't even a deist, in that he did not consider a creator necessary. He simply chose to call the wondrous way that the universe works "god". Nothing more. But since you're using the ol' Appeal to Authority Fallacy, shall I point out how many scientists TODAY believe in a god? In fact, it's far less than 10%. As a bonus question, what percentage of men in prison in the US today believe in a god? In fact, it's 99.79%. Should THAT tell us something? Good job anonymous. Keep asking questions. It's how we find things out. Don't just settle for a comforting or popular answer. Settle only for the truth. And then question it. Peace. Happy New World. I mean year. Week one hundred and fifty - December 2010 Did some last minute Christmas shopping, then watched the Alistair Sim version of A Christmas Carol. Surely the greatest story ever told. A wonderful message for any time of year. There were also nice messages left on The Wall Street Journal website following my essay and Q and A. (And some not so nice ones obviously.) But whether you agree or disagree thanks for reading. A special thank you to all the nice, genuine Christians who said they are praying for me by the way. I took it at face value and assume you are doing it with good intentions. Even though I don't believe in the power of prayer, for obvious reasons, I think that if people genuinely wish the rest of humanity well, then this will eventually manifest itself in their actions. To the Christians who were clearly being patronizing and suggesting that a lack of belief in their God equates to immorality and therefore that I need saving, I also say thank you. It's nice that you believe you are putting a good word in for me. However you shouldn't really be telling me about your prayers according to your rule book. "Whenever you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, because they love to pray while standing in synagogues and on street corners so that people can see them. Truly I say to you, they have their reward. But whenever you pray, go into your room, close the door, and pray to your Father in secret. And your Father, who sees in secret, will reward you" (Mathew 6:5-6) It's a bit weird bothering praying at all to be honest as God knows what you're wishing for already. It's like he's saying, "now ask me nicely." Wonder how he decides which ones to grant? I've got an awful lot praying for me at the moment so hopefully it's like a phone vote on The X Factor. "And low, the one with the most prayers... and definitely going through to everlasting life is... Ricky!" (Dermot, ITV 1)  If prayers are like Tweets, I'm trending at the moment. Merry Christmas and thank God this is finally available. 
So the debate rages. That's a good thing. Anything that makes people check and reassess the way they live their lives, and affect others, can only be healthy. I'm disappointed that many Christians took it personalIy though. I thought I could not have been clearer. I do not believe in ANY god. The only reason I mentioned the Christian God was because that was the one I was brought up to believe. That's the one I know about. The Bible is the only holy book I have studied. I believe all religions are equally as good and bad as each other. Christianity is the only one I could really claim to "know". (But thank you too all the Christians and other believers who were gracious enough to point out that if you can be good without faith then that's the important thing.) As I said in my first essay I was always big a fan of Jesus. A kind, brave, forgiving, open minded, gentle and compassionate man. I was never such a big fan of Christians. I saw so few similarities between Christians and Christ. Even after I stopped believing in the possibility of a God (or any other supernatural being) I never stopped believing that Jesus was a great role model. It's just that I saw no significant correlation between being like him and believing in a God. It was tragic that even though he was a good man with all those virtues, he was crucified because his beliefs did not coincide with the majority. Hmmm? Nor do mine. Bit worrying. Maybe I should carry on trying to be virtuous but pretend I'm doing it to go to heaven. Then I'll be safe and popular, and even though I'll be lying, no one will know. And since there is no God anyway, I may as well be thought of as good on earth (which seems to be associated with God in many parts of the world), and not offend anyone. Or maybe I just won't answer any more questions. Maybe I'll just ask some from now on. Where did God come from? (Not allowed to answer "he's always been here". Doesn't make sense. Sounds mental.) Oh no. You answered "he's always been here" didn't you? OK, Where was he? (Not allowed to answer "he was everywhere", or "nowhere" or "can't be answered in physical, or logical or scientific terms" or "we can't understand the answer because we haven't got God's brain". Again it doesn't make sense. Sounds just as mental.) Oh shit you did it again. OK. Why did he create the universe? (Answer however you want for this one, but no clues.) And why did he wait so long? No need to write an essay. There's no prize. Just answer to yourself for fun. Spend a few days. Don't even discuss it with anyone. Just think about it for yourself. Have a lovely Christmas. (Yes I know that includes the word Christ. I say "Thursday" too. That's named after Thor.) Did a follow up Q and A with The Wall Street Journal about Atheism. 
Bit of Christmas shopping. (I only buy things from shops that wrap it too now.) Worked out. Jet lagged. Champagne. (It's Christmas.) Trailer. Phew! Made it back to broken Britain in time for Christmas. We were meant to fly back at the weekend but England was closed apparently. It snowed, so one of the biggest economies in the world was not open for business. Remember last year when this happened and transport officials and councils said that they'd run out of salt because it's not worth stocking all that salt because it doesn't usually snow? Next year... they should get more salt. Where's all the fucking salt anyway? We don't eat as much now so there should be much more about. Karl said this is the safest place in the world for slugs. Ha ha. The Wall Street Journal piece has gone a bit mental. I'll hang out here over the Christmas period, in a country that is 44% atheist. America is considerably less but I'm working on it. Leave it with me. I wish WSJ hadn't stuck that title on it. "A Holiday Message" sounds unnecessarily provocative. It wasn't meant to be. They asked me to write an essay and one of the topics was 'Why I'm an Atheist'. It was just a personal account to be honest. Just for the record, I'm not an atheist solely because of my brother saying, "do you believe in God?" and my mum getting worried. That was simply the catalyst that made me question years of just accepting things that adults had fed me. That's what kids do. They learn from adults. And they accept it. That's why I believed in Santa Clause till I was 8 too. If that myth was constantly reinforced a lot of people would believe that into and throughout adulthood as well. It would also be acceptable. But then people who believed in the easter bunny would kill some of the people who believed in Santa then the Toothy Farians would kick off and there would be lots of wars. It's a good job we don't believe such rubbish after about 8 years old isn't it? Back for The Globes after Christmas. Already been fitted for the suit so I will keep roast dinners down to 10 or 11 over the next couple of weeks. Did another little painting. 
The Wall Street Journal want to do a follow-up interview to my little essay. It's their most trafficked post in a long time apparently with over 3,000 comments and 50,000 "likes" on Facebook. It's quite amazing how not believing in magic can still cause controversy. Imagine if I'd done an essay entitled "Why I don't believe in Wizards" or "Why I believe in Gravity". Don't think it would get that much attention. Still I suppose that's why there's still fun to be had. Thanks to all the responses, even the mental ones. And to all the other papers and blogs that ran it; [NY Mag] | [The Week] Talking of believing absolute bollocks, there's a little clip from the animated ramblings of the shaven chimp doing the rounds. It's from the second season which airs 14th Jan on HBO. Week one hundred and forty-nine - December 2010 I wrote this for The Wall Street Journal. Please tweet it to the world. Or leave angry comments. Both are fun. A beautiful day in Manhattan. Fucking cold, but beautiful nonetheness. Did the last bit of promo for my HBO special. It was an interview for Extra and I was with Jerry Seinfeld at the time (normal) so I roped him into promoting my stand-up for me. He said wonderful things about me which is about 10 times cooler than me saying wonderful things about me. I am of course willing to do that if there is no one else around. Jerry, on the other hand, hates me saying wonderful things about him. It's so funny to see him squirm. He is amazingly humble considering what he's achieved. I, however, am a cocky cunt who likes to annoy people. (Or am I?) (yes) (hmmm really?) (definitely) (we'll see) (we've seen) Here's a little Q&A from TV Guide And here's a little free podcast of Karl's version of the Nativity. [iTunes link] Have a nice weekend. Funny or Die have exposed my sordid past in the form of a pop video. This is worse than Wikileaks. The least you can do is watch my HBO special. This will ease my shame. Did an interview and photo shoot for The L.A. Times. Black T-shirt, both expressions; the works! Started thinking about jokes for The Golden Globes. It's quite an exercise in bravery. You think of a great line then you realise that you are almost certainly going to bump into the person you just made the butt of the joke a few minutes after. You better have a good excuse. Or... make sure the target of your joke is old and weak and feeble. This is my usual tactic. Betty White is gonna fucking get it. And Mickey Rooney is in trouble too. I have nothing bad to say about Mark Wahlberg, Mickey Rourke or Russell Crowe. My favourite Daily Show appearance so far. (The video won't work outside America - but it should be on 4oD tomorrow) Completely ad libbed with no mention of anything relevant. Perfect. I would love to do a whole show with Jon, just talking absolute bollocks. It worked for the podcasts. Did a day of promo for The Golden Globes. Now I'm off to the gym so I can eat myself silly in one of my favourite New York restaurants. Swings and roundabouts. (They are my favourite machines in the gym.) Letterman went well. I love doing that show. Obviously. Did some daytime TV today which was fun. Me and Jeff Bridges were on The Today Show together then got a fast car over to appear on Regis and Kelly. We're thinking of doing a double act. It's so fucking cold that I thought my ears would shatter if someone bumped into me. Went to buy a hat. Found one I liked. Turned out it was real fur so didn't buy it. The label said "Sheared Beaver". I asked what that meant. Was the poor creature killed? Or did it just get a hair cut like a sheep? They told me they think they just shave it. But what does the beaver do then? Is it bald and freezing? Do they farm them? Are they happy? Is it summer and it grows back for the winter? No one was sure. I got out my iPhone to google it. Jane pointed out that I may not find exactly what I'm looking for if I type in "Sheared Beaver". Good point. I bought a wooly bobble hat. I'll ask John Stewart later on The Daily Show. He knows everything. Making my 17th Letterman appearance tonight. I packed a jumper especially as he likes the studio at about 50 degrees Fahrenheit. Saw this in our local supermarket. 
They're probably good friends as they have a lot in common... They even look a bit alike... (Oooh racist) 46% fibre. That'll be the twigs. Week one hundred and forty-eight - December 2010 Just a quick one. It has been reported that I said ALL Twitter users should get a life. I didn't. I said celebrities who constantly tweet their love lives should get a life. My point was why don't they just call each other? Please tweet this correction my lovely tweeters. Off to New York. Tomorrow will feel like a day off. Back to New York. Seven hours with nothing to do except have three lunches, champagne and watch two movies I wouldn't watch under any other circumstance. Had a get together in a local restaurant for Jane's birthday last night. Karl had indigestion before we'd even ordered. He said, "You know them capsules that you break over your pillow and the vapour helps you breathe?" I said, "yeah." He said, "I just ate one by mistake because they were in the neurofen drawer." I fucking burst. Gump. Have a nice weekend. Had the most positive chat so far with Karl today about An Idiot Abroad 2. I'm quietly confident. Series 1 hits America next year on Discovery by the way. I will bribe various actors to plug it when they win Golden Globes. Did a press conference with a few dozen US journalists for The Golden Globes. Loads of questions about The new season of The Ricky Gervais Show too, which was nice. Should have some news about An Idiot Abroad in America soon by the way. But before all that, watch my new stand-up special on HBO, December 18th. Meanwhile, in the mother country you can get An Idiot Abroad, The Ricky Gervais Show and my live show Science on DVD. [Amazon UK links; Science | An Idiot Abroad  | The Ricky Gervais Show ]
(I should just remind everyone that, just like my first HBO special which was basically "Fame" plus the best bits from my previous UK tours, the new HBO special is basically "Science" plus some best bits of previous shows too. It's all officially new to America but with illegal downloading and imports some people may have seen stuff before. Not my fault, but just wanted to warn you.) Also did an interview with Loraine Kelly and wrote with Steve. While I was doing all this Karl was installing a new kitchen unit. How amazing is this? 
I can get into that mind with a coin. And so can you... Just buy the fucking audiobooks and DVDs. Oh and buy the Big Issue too. Also a huge thank you to all the people that bid for my painting on ebay in aid of The Willow Foundation. It went for £1600 in the end. Merry Christmas. Ricky's Blog continues with Week Eighty-eight here ... |
Meet Ricky
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'Special Correspondents' Cast Revealed
Get the low-down on the principal cast for Ricky's new movie along with a group photo for you to match the host of household names and well-known faces. Read more here. |
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'Special Correspondents' First Cast Photo
The Wrap has an exclusive look at the cast of Ricky's new movie. Read more here. |
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Brent Movie to be released in 2016
'Life On The Road' is set for a summer 2016 release. Read more here. |
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Brent Movie gets funding
The lights are green for The Office's David Brent to return in 'Life On The Road' Read more here. |
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Netflix buy 'Special Correspondents'
In a characteristically maverick move by Netflix, Ricky's next movie 'Special Correspondents' will make its debut on the game-changing streaming entertainment service. Read more here. |
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News Vlog
Hear about Ricky's latest goings on - straight from the man himself. Watch here on YouTube. |
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Ricky talks fame, philosophers and following a career in TV.
Details magazine has a Q and A with Ricky Read here. |
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9 Questions with Ricky
Backstage chats with Ricky as 'Derek' is nominated for a Golden Globe. Read here. |
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Vote For Derek
Wherever you are in the world you can vote for Derek in the National TV Awards Vote here. |
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The Improbable Success of Ricky Gervais
A marketeer's perspective on Ricky in the limelight. Read here. |
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Ricky on his 21st Emmy Nomination
The Hollywood Reporter quizzes Ricky on his career to date. Read here. |
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Ricky's Facebook Q and A
Ricky answers readers' questions via facebook. Read here on Gervaisaholics.com. |
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Letterman No.26
See a bit of Ricky's 26th appearance on the Late Show . Watch here. |
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TV Choice Awards
Derek has been nominated for a TV Choice Award. Vote here. |
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Life Lessons
Buzzfeed collates a selection of adages drawn from Derek Read here. |
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On The Daily Show...
Ricky tells Jon Stewart that he's still a fat guy at heart. Watch here. |
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On The Tonight Show...
Ricky Plays "Word Sneak" with Jimmy Fallon. Watch here. |
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Brent Gets Standing Ovation
A run of sell-out gigs ended at Hammersmith's Apollo on Satuday. Read the reviews... Daily Telegraph Radio Times London Evening Standard |
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Ricky Talks To Q Magazine
He submits to a probing via Q's regular 'cash for questions' feature which relies on its readers to come up with the questions. And great questions they are too. Read here. |
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Ricky's Nine Commandments
ShortList magazine asks Ricky for his tenets of kindness. Read here. |
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The Office remembered
The Guardian TV blog reassesses The Office and its impact... Read here. |
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Read the Sunday Times interview.
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Vanity Fair Interview
Ricky gets quizzed about Muppets Most Wanted and more. Read here. |
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Read the Daily News's one page biography.
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Brand New Clip
Here's a new clip from Ricky's new movie, Muppets Most Wanted. Watch here. |
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Ricky on Jimmy Kimmel
Ricky chats about his new Muppets movie on ABC's Jimmy Kimmel Live. Watch part 1, part 2 and part 3. |
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WSJ talks Muppets, Celebs and more
Ricky meets the Wall Street Journal for a chat heralding his new movie, Muppets Most Wanted.
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Ricky starts filming Night At The Museum 3 Read more here at Mail Online
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Ricky on the Radio
Watch Ricky guest on the Opie and Anthony Show. Here on YouTube. |
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On-Set Interiew
Den of Geek chat with Ricky on the set of Muppets Most Wanted... Read here. |
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New Trailer
Ricky's latest trailer for the new Muppets Movie takes the piss out of Twitter gorps. Watch here. |
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Ricky chats about Derek with Charlie Rose
With Derek coming to Netflix UK on Jan 30th, Ricky talks to Bloomburg TV about his latest creation. Watch here. |
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Ricky meets David Blaine
The well-known illusionist shows Ricky another use for a skewer. Watch here. |
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Person of the Year
PETA, the animal charity, has named Ricky as its person of the year 2013. Read here. |
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£1,000 Cub Cake
Ricky buys bear-shaped treat at a charity auction. Read here. |
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Ricky In Time
Ricky writes about success and styles himself a "cocky little nobody". Read here. |
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Derek reviewed
Ricky hailed as the 'Tarantino of nice' Read here. |
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David Blaine 'Real or Magic' Stumps Ricky Gervais with Amazing Knife |
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39 Feline Gervaisalikes
A number of cats that look like Ricky See here. |
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New International Trailer for 'Muppets Most Wanted' |
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Top 50 News Pics
Ricky & Barney the dog makes the list of the 50 most powerful news images of 2013. Read here at ITV.com. |
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David Brent - Live
Brent wows fans and critics at first ever gig. Read the first reviews here... The Guardian Metro The Mirror The Independent The Evening Standard |
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Ricky Talks Charity
The donations website Just Giving talks to Ricky about charity. Read here. |
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Ricky on Derek in Sydney
Ricky chats to the Sydney Morning Herald. Read here. |
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Derek Review Roundup
Here're some more Derek-related reviews and articles... Fast Company. Rolling Stone. Newsday. Montreal Gazette. Toronto Sun. Buzz Feed. |
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Vote For Derek
The National Television Awards have opened voting for the January 2014 awards. You can give your support to Derek in the poll here. |
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Ricky Chats With Charlie
Ricky sits down with the great Charlie Rose... Watch here. |
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Writing Credit
Ricky tells Fast Company about the biggest single influence on his writing... Watch here. |
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Letterman No. 25
Ricky's made his 25th appearance on The Late Show with David Letterman Watch here. |
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Ricky's Times Talk
An audience with Ricky in New York hosted by the New York Times. Watch in full here. |
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Derek In Review
Entertainment Weekly calls #Derek "marked by grace." Read the full article here . |
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Ricky On The Red Carpet
Ricky talks to Brad Blanks on the red carpet of The New York Premiere of Derek. Watch here on YouTube. |
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Ricky's Reddit "Ask Me Anything"
Ricky answers readers' questions. Read the results here at reddit. |
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Derek Hits The Airwaves
Listen to Ricky's interview on Black Sky Radio. Here on YouTube. |
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Hollywood Reporter's Video Report
Watch the footage from the Hollywood Reporter's interview with Ricky. Here on YouTube. |
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Hollywood Reports on Derek
God-hating, Dinners with Seinfeld and Derek on Netflix... Read here. |
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Slough Makes International Impression
David Brent's ode to his favourite town has been covered by Toro Y Moi... Listen here. And refresh your memory of the seminal original here |
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Derek Is Big Down Under
The Sydney Morning Herald looks at Derek, which has just started showing in Australia... Read here. |
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Brent - The Album
The NME makes a strong case for David Brent to release an album as a follow-up to his YouTube series of guitar tutorials. Read here. |
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Ricky talks about godless tweets
Ricky guests with his heathen Twitter pals @MrOzAtheist & @GSpellchecker on @AdamReakes's Herd Mentality Podcast Listen via ITunes or directly. |
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2 Million and counting
Ricky breaks the 2 Million barrier for Learn Guitar with David Brent Read more here. |
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Brent on Jimmy Fallon
David Brent pops up on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. Watch here. |
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International Acclaim For The Office
The Office takes 14th position in US magazine Entertainment Weekly's All-Time Top 100 TV Shows - by far the highest raked UK show on the list. See the full list here. |
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Opie & Anthony
Ricky's favourite appearance on The Opie & Anthony Show in New York. It's a shame Opie & Anthony couldn't be there. Listen here. |
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Ricky in GQ
Ricky gets probed on the return of Brent amongst other things... Read here and Watch here. |
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Meanwhile in America...
Ricky's been on TV & Radio and watching a game called basketball... Here's Ricky on The Daily Show. (US only) On Opie and Anthony's radio show. On Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. And courtside at the Knicks game. |
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Robot monkey butlers
Ricky looks into the future and has some surprising predictions... Read here. |
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Ricky's Muppets role
The producer of the new Muppet movie, The Muppets...Again!, says Ricky's role was tailor-made for him. Read here. |
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Ricky explains the return of Brent
Shortlist has a piece by Ricky explaining why the time was right to revisit The Office. Read here. |
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New and Exclusive
Ricky has made a deal with YouTube to bring new, exclusive content to his own YouTube Channel. Read about the deal here and subscribe to Ricky's channel here. |
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copyright © Ricky Gervais 2004 - 2010